Chapter 198

The bleeding had stopped.

I woke up on the seventh morning, and the first thing I noticed was the absence of pain, the absence of heaviness, the return of clarity to my mind and energy to my body. I stretched, feeling the familiar shift in my body that told me my cycle had turned, that I was entering my fertile time.

Ovulation.

I lay in bed for a moment, listening to the sounds of the household waking. The Pearlings were with Caelion in the lagoon, their routine well established now that they were three months old. He cared for them through the night and early morning, and I took over during the day, trading off so that we both had rest, both had time with our daughters. It was working, this dance we had choreographed, this balance we had found.

But today, I had other plans.

I found Veylan on the shore, his silver hair gleaming in the morning light, his silver eyes distant as he watched the waves. He was beautiful, my quiet one, my stoic warrior to most but so gentle with me. And he was one of my mates who did not have a child of his own blood.

I have twenty children in total. Through our bond, through our family, they were Veylan’s too. But they did not carry his genes, his heritage, his particular lineage. And I knew, had always known, that he wanted that. Even if he would not admit it.

"Veylan," I said, settling beside him on the sand.

He turned, his smile warm but guarded. "Krys. You are feeling better?"

"Much," I confirmed. "The cycle has turned. I am... I am fertile now."

His smile faltered, just slightly, a shadow crossing his eyes. "I see."

"I want to try," I said, not beating around the bush, not hiding my intentions. "I want to give you a child, Veylan. Your own. Ours together."

He stiffened, his body going rigid, his gaze dropping to the sand. "No."

"No?" I repeated, surprised by the vehemence in his voice.

"No," he said again, turning to face me fully, his eyes troubled, his hands trembling. "Krys, I cannot. I will not."

I stared at him, hurt blooming in my chest, sharp and unexpected. "You do not want a child with me?"

"By the Beast Gods, no," he said, his voice breaking. "That is not... Krys, I want children with you. I have always wanted children with you. But I cannot... I will not risk you."

He stood, pacing away from me, his movements agitated, his usual calm shattered. "I saw what happened with the Pearlings. I saw you, Krys. You were so exhausted. You slept for three days. Do you know what that did to us? To me? Seeing you lying still not moving for three days I nearly lost my mind."

He turned back to me, his silver eyes swimming with tears. "What if it happens again? What if the next birth is like that? What if you do not come back? I cannot... I cannot survive that. I cannot lose you. Not for a child. Not for anything."

I stood, my own heart breaking at his fear, at his pain. I crossed to him, my hands finding his, my fingers intertwining with his trembling ones.

"Veylan," I said softly. "Look at me."

He did, his eyes desperate, afraid.

"Wolf pups are smaller," I said, my voice gentle but firm. "Much smaller. When they are born, they are tiny, like the lion cubs were, like the cheetah cubs. Not like the Pearlings. Not half my arm length. Small. Manageable. The birth would not be like that. It would be like my first births, with Ravin. Difficult, yes, but not dangerous. Not life threatening."

"You cannot know that" he whispered.

"I can," I said, my hands coming up to cup his face. "I know my body, Veylan. I know what I can handle. And I want this. I want your child. I want to see what we would make together, what combination of you and me would look like. I want to hold a baby that has your eyes, your hair, your gentle spirit. I want that, Veylan. I want it so much."

He closed his eyes, tears tracking down his cheeks. "And if something goes wrong?"

"Then we will face it together," I said. "As we have faced everything. But I am strong, my love. I am stronger than you know. And I want this. I want your child. Please. Do not deny us this because of fear."

He was silent for a long moment, his body trembling beneath my hands. Then he opened his eyes, and I saw the moment he surrendered, the moment his fear was overcome by his desire, his love, his hope.

"Yes," he whispered. "Yes, Krys. If you are sure... if you truly want this... then yes. Let us try."

I kissed him then, soft and sweet and full of promise. "I am sure," I breathed against his lips. "I have never been more sure of anything."

We went to his room, the room I barely see since I haven’t spent any intimate time with them, not with the chaos of having pearling and Khemari’s threat consuming our energy. It had been so long since I had been intimate with any of them, too long, my body aching for connection, for completion. Sex with Eryx was wonderful. But I need to share myself with the others too.

Veylan was gentle at first, hesitant, his fear still lingering. But I was not gentle. I was hungry, desperate, needy. I pulled at his clothes, my mouth finding his neck, his collarbone, the curve of his shoulder. I needed him to know I was here; I was alive, I was ready.

"Krys," he gasped, his hands coming up to grip my waist. "Slow... we should go slow..."

"No," I said, my voice rough, demanding. "No more slow. No more waiting. I want you, Veylan. I want you inside me. I want your child. Now."

He groaned, his control snapping, his body responding to my urgency. He lifted me, carrying me to the bed, laying me down with a reverence that made my heart clench. Then he was on top of me, his mouth claiming mine, his hands roaming my body with a hunger that matched my own.

It had been too long. Far too long.

I arched beneath him, my nails digging into his back, my legs wrapping around his waist. He was hard, ready, and I was wet, desperate, my body prepared for this, for him, for the creation we were about to attempt.

"Veylan," I moaned, my head falling back as he entered me, slow and deep and perfect. "Yes. Yes. More."

He moved with a rhythm that was familiar and new all at once, his hips rolling against mine, his body fitting mine like we had been designed for each other. Every stroke hit the right spot, every angle sent pleasure spiraling through me, building and building until I was panting, sobbing, clawing at him for more.

"Please," I begged, my voice breaking. "Please, Veylan. Harder. I need... I need you to..."

He understood. He always understood. He shifted his angle, driving deeper, hitting a spot inside me that made me see stars, made me scream his name, made my body convulse around him in the first orgasm of what would be many.

He did not stop. He kept moving, kept driving into me, his stamina that of the wolf he was, his need as desperate as my own. He flipped me over, pulling me onto my hands and knees, entering me from behind with a force that made me cry out, his hands gripping my hips, his voice growling my name over and over like a prayer.

"Krys. My Krys. My mate. My love."

I came again, my body tightening around him, milking him, urging him toward his own release. But he held back, his control incredible, his desire to please me, to satisfy me, overriding his own need.

"Again," he demanded, his hand reaching around to find the sensitive nub between my legs, his fingers circling, pressing, driving me toward another peak. "Again, Krys. Come for me again. Let me feel you."

I did. I could not help but obey, my body his to command, his to pleasure, his to fill. I came with a scream that surely carried to the other rooms, my body shaking, my vision going white at the edges.

And finally, finally, he let go. His rhythm faltered, his grip tightened, and he buried himself deep, deep inside me, his release tearing through him with a howl that was part wolf, part man, all love. I felt him pulse inside me, felt the heat of his seed filling me, and I prayed, I hoped, I believed that this time, this time, we had made a child.

We collapsed together, tangled in sheets and sweat and the aftermath of mind-blowing pleasure. He held me close, his face buried in my hair, his body still trembling with aftershocks.

"Thank you," he whispered, his voice rough, emotional. "Thank you for wanting my child. Thank you for convincing me. Thank you for... for everything."

I turned in his arms, my hand finding his cheek, my eyes meeting his. "Thank you for trusting me," I said. "Thank you for overcoming your fear. Thank you for loving me enough to try."

He kissed my palm, his lips warm and reverent. "I would do anything for you," he whispered. "Even face my own terror."

I smiled. "Good," I said, my voice dropping to a purr. "Because we have a week. An entire week where I am ripe and ready. I expect you to do your very best to ensure we succeed. Multiple times. Every day. Until there is no doubt."

Veylan’s eyes widened, his breath hitching, his body already responding to my words. "Krys..."

"I am being cheeky," I admitted, grinning at him. "But I am also serious. We have seven days to make sure you get me pregnant. I intend to use every single one of them."

He laughed, the sound rich and delighted and full of promise. "Then I shall endeavor to please you, my mate. As many times as necessary. As many times as you desire."

"That’s the spirit," I said, snuggling closer to him. "Now rest. We begin again in an hour."

We lay there for a long time, holding each other, basking in the glow of what we had done, what we might have created. And I knew that whatever happened, whether we had made a child this time or would need to try again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next, we had taken the first step toward expanding our family once more.

And it was magical.

It was perfect.

It was everything I had hoped for.