Chapter 584: The Classics Are Always the Coolest

Naruto finally realized what was wrong.

Wasn't this basically—

'I thought of you as a friend, but you're trying to become my dad?'

Strangely enough, though, discovering something like this didn't upset Naruto nearly as much as it should have.

After more than a full day of nonstop shocks, he was gradually getting used to how bizarre the Engraved Tsukuyomi world was.

Yesterday, his father Namikaze Minato had already been exposed as having at least nine suspicious bonds.

Compared with that, his mother Kushina having just one questionable relationship hardly seemed worth panicking over.

Besides, this was only an illusionary world created by Engraved Tsukuyomi.

None of it was real.

With that comforting thought, Naruto cautiously poked his head out from hiding to see what was happening.

If his mother still wasn't planning to leave anytime soon, then Naruto would simply have to give up on buying that cucumber and postpone his Sage Mode training.

"Hm?"

The moment Naruto looked out, a chill ran through his entire body.

The rear entrance of the supermarket was dark.

And silent.

Naruto immediately realized something was wrong.

Sure enough, a voice came from directly behind him.

"Naruto, have you already mastered the Nine-Tails' chakra?"

"Y-Yeah."

Naruto forced himself to remain calm as he slowly turned around.

Kushina was standing right behind him.

Naruto had no idea when she had gotten there.

He didn't know whether she had noticed him spying earlier either.

Nor did he know where Makoto, who had just been talking to her, had gone.

Had he already left?

Naruto could only pretend he knew nothing.

For some reason, Engraved Tsukuyomi was feeling less and less like a game and more like a horror movie.

"Looks like you weren't completely bluffing yesterday when you said you were strong."

Kushina looked him over.

"If that's the case, I'll acknowledge your strength for now. You can temporarily stop attending your instructor's training sessions."

Naruto's eyes brightened.

"And another thing. The chakra inside you is the Yin half of the Nine-Tails, so when you draw on it, your body changes into a girl's. Once you stop using the chakra and return it to the seal, your body will change back."

Kushina very considerately explained his condition.

"That's all it was?!"

Naruto nearly collapsed in relief.

"You scared me half to death!"

He immediately tried forcing the Nine-Tails' chakra back into the seal.

Sure enough, the unfamiliar weight on his chest rapidly vanished, and his hair shortened again.

Feeling his precious 2D miraculously resurrect, Naruto almost cried with joy.

Great.

He wouldn't need the cucumber after all.

And so mother and son returned home together, seemingly harmonious on the surface while each concealed their own thoughts.

Unfortunately for Kushina, Naruto had just spent the day reading classified records.

He immediately recognized that what she told him had been only half true.

Naruto might be slow about plenty of things, but when it concerned the disappearance of his precious 2D, he paid very close attention.

His mother claimed he transformed into a girl because the Yin Nine-Tails chakra was inside him.

Yet according to the classified records, the actual Yin half of the Nine-Tails was sealed inside Minato.

Naruto transformed because he himself was supposedly a life-form created from the demon fox's chakra.

Even if his father really had used Yin Nine-Tails chakra to create some bizarre purple bow as the records claimed, Minato certainly hadn't lost his own 2D in the process.

Therefore—His mother was lying.

Naruto knew she was lying.

He simply had absolutely no courage to expose her.

Dictator Kushina was far too intimidating.

When she suddenly appeared behind him earlier, Naruto had already begun mentally preparing himself for death.

Then nothing happened.

She had even patiently answered his questions.

Naruto almost felt touched.

At this point, he was practically developing Stockholm syndrome.

…

After dinner, Naruto returned to his bedroom and began reviewing everything that had happened that day.

Then something suddenly occurred to him.

His mother would eventually discover that he had accessed classified records.

That was inevitable.

Which meant Naruto needed to become as strong as possible before that happened.

But he had also realized something far more important.

Those so-called classified records were ultimately nothing more than documents that existed with Hokage Uzumaki Kushina's permission.

In other words—

If Kushina didn't want something recorded in Konoha's intelligence archives, then even if it happened every single day, there might not be so much as a single sentence about it anywhere.

That was the conclusion Naruto reached after finally realizing that this world's Kushina was a dictator.

Though whether Naruto actually understood what the word dictator meant was another question.

Once he understood that, Naruto stopped obsessing over the archives.

The information there might be exactly like Kushina's words earlier—

Half true, half false.

Rather than blindly trust the intelligence, the information Naruto personally discovered would be far more reliable.

Take Kushina and Makoto's relationship, for example.

Judging by what Naruto had witnessed behind the supermarket, those two were far too familiar with each other to have only recently met.

Yet Konoha's classified archives contained absolutely nothing about it.

Thinking about it, that made perfect sense.

Kushina personally reviewed Konoha's classified intelligence.

Why would she ever allow official records to contain information suggesting that she, a married woman, had an improper relationship?

The same applied to Minato.

Kushina had claimed that simply going outside to buy cigarettes was enough for her to encounter nine people with suspicious ties to Naruto's father.

Yet that wasn't written anywhere in the classified records either.

Apparently, for the sake of appearances, none of it had ever been officially documented.

Without an official record, nobody could openly discuss it.

As for what people said privately…Naruto kept thinking until his brain finally overloaded.

Exhaustion swept over him, and he fell asleep.

…

The next morning, Naruto decided his first priority was finding somewhere safe to relearn Sage Mode.

Training at home was absolutely out of the question.

There was no sense of security whatsoever.

His dictator mother Kushina could kick down the door at any moment.

His Flying Raijin father Minato didn't even need to use the door.

"Naruto."

Minato, wearing an apron while cleaning the house, noticed Naruto preparing to leave.

"Take this with you. And remember to come home on time for dinner, or I'll come find you."

He picked up a Flying Raijin kunai from the coffee table and tossed it over.

"…"

Naruto caught the kunai and silently nodded.

Who could have imagined it?

In the legendary stories of the real shinobi world, the major villages had been so terrified of being caught by the Yellow Flash that they issued standing orders allowing their shinobi to abandon a mission the moment they encountered Namikaze Minato.

Yet here in Engraved Tsukuyomi, his father was the one constantly getting taken advantage of.

And apparently by Makoto of all people—

Someone who, unlike his extraordinary real-world counterpart, was nothing more than an ordinary supermarket owner here.

Although, admittedly, Minato himself wasn't exactly innocent in this world either.

Naruto sighed.

Walking down the street, he found himself thinking that perhaps having both parents alive wasn't nearly as wonderful as he had always imagined.

Then, as he continued along, he overheard several people discussing names he recognized.

Naruto immediately slowed down.

"You know Makoto, the supermarket owner?"

"Of course. He's supposedly the Hokage's lover. I heard Lady Hokage even got jealous over him with the Mizukage and Tsuchikage during the Five Kage Summit."

"Seriously? What's so special about that guy? Is he really that handsome?"

"Who knows? Maybe he's got some weird charm technique—or maybe he's just especially good at working his hips."

"Has to be something like that. That guy is disgusting."

"What do you think would happen if Uzumaki Naruto or Namikaze Minato found out? Hehehe."

"They'd definitely go deal with him. Even if those two are useless, they're still actual shinobi. That's got to be better than some country bumpkin who survives by clinging to women."

"…"

Naruto finally couldn't tolerate it anymore.

That's right!

Makoto was his friend!

How could someone form that kind of suspicious bond with their friend's mother?

Wasn't that one of the worst forms of bullying imaginable?!

Outside the illusion, Kushina and the other viewers immediately leaned forward in anticipation.

Finally!

Naruto was finally going to stand up against bullying!

Then Naruto leapt in front of the gossiping villagers and pointed straight at them.

"I won't let you insult Makoto!"

Everyone froze.

Naruto raised his voice with complete conviction.

"Makoto is the Shadow of Support!

"He's the man supporting my mom from behind—

"AND MAKOTO IS THE COOLEST!"