113: Raneer

She’s about what I expected, Darcie thought. Maybe a little worse off, but considering what she’s dealing with…

Darcie followed the blue suit escorting her down the walkway. As established beforehand, Professor Konderlacht wanted to know whatever was needed, and they would be meeting in Kull’s office. Thankfully, the soldier escorting her wasn’t asking questions. Not only did she not have the right to know, she would have to then deal with Darcie explaining the legal ramifications of ‘confidentiality’.

At least the walk gave Darcie time to sort her thoughts about Miss Kadell’s circumstances.

It was a short meeting with the Artificer, for a number of reasons. It didn’t need to be a long session- just enough for Darcie to get a rough idea of where Eris was sitting. Then, Darcie could take a bit of her own time to try and figure out some options or tools to properly help. Not to mention, Eris’s string was wound pretty tight, and forcing the session to continue long after Eris had been made uncomfortable would only take steps backwards. Last, but also notably, time itself was quite valuable for Eris- as had been stated multiple times. Darcie got the distinct feeling that any further ‘sessions’ with Eris would end up as nothing more than mealtime conversations, and likely never more than ten minutes long. There was simply too many important things for Eris to do.

By herself.

Gods, Darcie could only imagine if the scenario happened to her, or anyone else for that matter.

Violence without reason was wrong. Wars happened, yes, but that was in defense of something, or to further it. Animals needed to be hunted for their meat, so that the predators wouldn’t starve to death. However, picking a fight with another random person on the road and beating the pulp out of them for no reason other than their existence was good for nothing.

If Darcie did that, she would get arrested. She would get punished for pursuing that thought of wrath in her mind, and there would have been no reward.

But then, what if one day there wasn’t a punishment anymore?

Darcie could go and beat someone to within an inch of their life, letting out every bit of anger. She would know it was wrong, and would hate that she was doing it, but when it was over, that was that. There would be no prison. No manacles. Not even a slap on the wrist. Nobody would care and nothing bad would happen to her for the awful thing she did, therefore making the only reason not to do it her own repulsions to the idea.

But then it would go further.

She gets proof- a deep understanding that if she goes and fights a random person, she would get a pouch full of moons. A direct reward of money, with absolutely no punishment whatsoever, all for the cost of beating the snot out of someone. It was a lot harder to ignore the feelings in her gut saying that something was wrong when every single part of the world was not only telling her the opposite, but encouraging her to do it. Especially if she, for instance, needed to use that money to help fund some war effort to save her country from an invading force.

Then a pouch full of moons turns into a pouch of stars- ten times the value. The cost? Picking that same fight against a person that doesn’t even have the option of fighting back to the same extent. The elderly. A child. A sickly person who is already suffering with no need for further punishment. Then it turns into a chest of stars if Darcie tortures them while she’s doing it. Not just inflicting the pain, but drawing it out. Making it slow. Making them suffer.

Anyone would hate doing that, but if they needed that money to help save the people they loved, all the morals in their head would be turned around. Soon, they wouldn’t be waiting for some sign that they needed to accomplish their task and would be rewarded- they would start seeking out the tasks themselves because that was what they ‘needed to do’. Especially when the stars turned into crowns, a further ten times the value.

Darcie shook her head.

Eris wasn’t just dealing with needing to become more powerful, it was the necessity of action fighting against the part of her mind reminding her that what she was doing was inherently wrong. Maybe not right now- with the sex and the flings and the hookups. In truth, none of that was really hurting anyone, especially given the insistence of finding volunteers. People who were willing to let Eris partake in sin.

But what happens when volunteers aren’t an option?

What happens when it isn’t just hookups and casual sex anymore?

And Eris…

Eris seemed to be in exactly the state that Darcie assumed she’d be. Scared of what she’d need to do next. Not wanting to become that horrible person that was required of her, and desperately latching on to whatever foundations were in her life. Jaxie.

Except Darcie could already see that Eris was getting things twisted around. No wonder. A girl like that, who prefers her whole life to be structured and precise in the way she wants, has everything flipped upside down and is rewarded for doing sin. She only does as much as she needs and takes things slow, but then she’s brought into a prison with a person who has already gone through the exact same thing. The difference being that Pravala made the impossible choice of embracing what she hated in order to find the strength to accomplish her goals.

It might not have even been that bad, if it had progressed naturally with Eris slowly coming to terms with her sexuality. But Pravala then violating Eris and putting her through that ordeal- using her own sin against her almost like a display of what Eris needed to do to others…

Darcie sighed as her and the soldier stepped through the doors of the office building and walked towards the stairs.

Sexual assault could already leave people feeling incredibly vulnerable, most times ending up in one of two ways. Either they avoid sex and intimacy entirely in an act to try to regain control of what they had lost, by shackling it down and away from everyone- including themselves. Or, the opposite.

Instead of hiding it away to keep their control, some might try to regain control of their sexuality on their own terms, by their rules. They partake in countless hookups or one-night stands, or become so overbearing in their existing relationships until they feel that they are indeed in control once again and not taking into account who they might be hurting in the process.

Clearly, this seemed to be a form of the latter, of Eris attempting to regain control though promiscuity. Unfortunately, there was then the whole internal debacle of needing to embrace Lust as an Artificer to help save the world, putting so much pressure on her that Eris was likely two steps away from snapping entirely.

Of course, it was impossible for Darcie to truly get a one-hundred-percent confirmation on everything going on in Eris’s head, but right now, it seemed like Eris was going through a particularly ugly combination.

Needing to be Lustful to become more powerful, and having a desperate, hate-fueled need to take back the sense of control through sexual aggression.

Gods, did Darcie ever have her work cut out for her.

When the escort knocked on the open doorframe of the office, a voice immediately came from within. “Raneer?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Darcie nodded towards the superintendent. Konderlacht then turned towards the escort.

“Return downstairs. When Mrs. Raneer is finished here, you will escort her back to where she will be staying in Marrix.”

The soldier nodded, turned and left. Darcie stepped inside the office and closed the door. Immediately, Professor Kull, who was sitting in one of two chairs on the other side of his own desk from Konderlacht who had taken his usual place, moved the other chair in an invitation for Darcie to sit. She did.

“I’d like a full report on everything you discussed,” Konderlacht said without preamble. Darcie shook her head.

“You won’t get it.”

“Excuse me?” Konderlacht raised an eyebrow. Darcie remained flat.

“Everything spoken in that room is between Eris and myself only. Not only do I have the legal requirement to retain confidentiality on all matters discussed between her and I, I have my own word. I promised her that I will do everything in my power to keep everything between us, so I will do exactly that.”

Konderlacht sighed, looking about ten years older. “I know you stated your requirement for confidentiality beforehand, but I have about a dozen commanding officers breathing down my neck for clarification and assurance on Kadell’s mental health, especially since your meetings with her are going to be taking up valuable time.”

“Then you may assure all of them that I will do what I can to help Eris, and only provide whatever information you are absolutely required to know. Anything more than that, on my part or yours, is a legal breach of privacy and I will be taking the appropriate responses.”

Konderlacht’s eye twitched. “I’m sure everyone breathing down my neck will love to hear that not only can I not tell them anything, you’re going to try and sue the Syndicate if they try to learn anything about our only weapon against the Hollow.”

“Except she isn’t a weapon,” Darcie narrowed her eyes. “She’s a person, and her name is Eris Limeen Kadell. It doesn’t matter how important she is or what she needs to do, if you push her, she’ll break and you’ll lose her. Treating her like a tool for a means to your end won’t get the results you want.”

Konderlacht sighed, then rested her face in her hands in a clear display of stress and frustration.

“Mrs. Raneer, believe me that I am trying my best to help Miss Kadell.”

“Forgive me, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.”

“Darcie, the-”

“Mrs. Raneer, please,” Darcie clarified. The dark-skinned woman glared, clasped her fingers tightly together, then set them down on the desk.

“Mrs. Raneer, the only reason Eris hadn’t been sent off to some private, secure facility workshop the day after Elmas discovered she was an Artificer was because I assured the other officials of the Syndicate that Eris would have everything she needed here at Marrix, and would be the safest location for her. Days later, she got trapped in the Obelisk for weeks on end with no confirmation of her well-being, only to return in a state that required a medical coma for multiple days.”

Konderlacht let out a deep breath.

“My authority over Eris was almost completely revoked at that point, only being allowed to keep Eris here at Marrix with her loved ones as long as every action taken was pre-approved by a board of officials that decided what Eris would and would not do. Their first orders were that she would have a permanent guardian to protect her at all times, and the second was that she was to use her Wonders of Artifice on the five pre-selected individuals. Eris herself declined that second part firmly, which as you can assume, only furthered the tensions. We nearly had to threaten them in order for them to agree that sparing time for a therapist was a worthwhile endeavour in regards to Eris’s health.”

For the first time, Kull spoke up from beside Darcie.

“I believe the only reason they even agreed to allocating the time for a therapist is because I raised the concern that if Miss Kadell’s mental state were to decline too far, she may attempt to act against the Syndicate, if not resort to self-harm. Not that I truly believe she would do either, but acting as though it was a potential risk may very well be the primary reason you are here right now.”

Darcie narrowed her eyes, sour disapproval leaving behind an uncomfortable sensation in her ears.

“Let me get this straight; The Syndicate didn’t want to give up time for a therapist for the single most important and stressed person in the entire world, and you tricked them to do so by telling them that Eris could be at risk of committing suicide? And now the Syndicate is demanding that you force me to give word-for-word reports on every conversation I have with Eris just to make sure that she doesn’t try to kill herself? Now, if you don’t give them the information they want, you’re going to get fired as the superintendent of Marrix and Eris will be taken away by force to some random private workshop away from everyone and everything she loves.”

Darcie leaned in. “There, she would be treated like a prisoner slave, almost exactly like the ones she saw in the Obelisk under the control of Pravala, a woman she despises with every fibre of her being, and surely that would only do good things for her perception of the people keeping her locked up. In fact, if I remember correctly from the notes you gave me about her, wasn’t the original reason she wanted to keep her class a secret because she was afraid of being used like a tool, in the exact same way the Syndicate officials are currently trying to do while pretending they aren’t?”

Both of the soldiers were silent. Darcie frowned and stood up, glaring at Konderlacht.

“Pardon my language, but every bit of that is bullshit.”

“Excuse me?” Kull asked. Darcie kept her eyes trained on the white-haired woman’s, both unflinching. The therapist continued.

“I never lie to people, so you can let all those people breathing down your neck know three things, and those are the only things they need to know. One: I do not believe Eris is at risk of bringing harm to herself or others. Two: I do not believe that Eris is at risk of acting against the well-being of the world. Just like everyone else in the Syndicate, she wants to stop the Hollow and any other world-ending threats that may arise, and she will do it in whatever way she can. Three: She is under an incomparable amount of stress right now. You should be trying to take weight off of her shoulders, not keep adding more on. And four, because I was wrong and it’s not three things. Eris is a person. If you stop treating her like one, she’ll stop trying to be one. If you blatantly breach her privacy at every opportunity and she finds out, there’s a non-zero chance that she won’t be on your side anymore.”

The silence that followed in the room was thick enough for Darcie to part like curtains as she turned and walked towards the door. She got one hand on the knob but was stopped before she could open it by Kull’s voice.

“What do you suggest, then?”

Darcie paused for a number of moments before responding to the man’s question.

“Has Eris even had a single conversation with her father since escaping the Obelisk? Quality time? What about Jaxie? Or Alex? And I’m not talking about a conversation on the war or what she needs to do next, or even sex to gather Desire. Just simple, genuine moments where Eris has the opportunity to be with the people she cares about. I already know that the answer is ‘no’, she hasn’t had any time of the sort, and that’s something you’ve gotta change.

Darcie rubbed the bridge of her nose between two fingers. “If nothing else, just let them all have breakfast tomorrow or something instead of whisking Eris off to her workshop for sixteen hours.”

Darcie opened the door and took a half-step outside before pausing. She let out a sigh and spoke over her shoulder towards the two officials.

“A soldier can’t fight if they don’t remember what they’re fighting for.”

Then she walked out without being dismissed.