Chapter 323: For Every Gracious Sin of Mine

[FROLO]

"It was rainy, the first time I saw you," Sergei said, walking toward Katya.

Each step was heavier than the last, knowing so well that this pretty little thing could make a run for it, and Sergei would be forced to prove that Katya wasn’t his prisoner and someone who had a choice.

Even if he was choosing to leave.

"What?" Katya asked in disbelief, like he couldn’t understand what the fuck Sergei was doing.

But the alpha just walked past him, like a man who was on some mission.

"I’d just finalized a meeting with Mr. Romanov in his office regarding his steel supplies. You were sitting at a desk on his side, with secretary as your title. Still so young, yet so achingly beautiful.

"Your father was saying something to me, but all I could see was the prettiest omega I’d ever seen," Sergei said quietly as he sat on the edge of the couch like a man who was readying himself for whatever the fuck the omega would do.

"Good for you. I’m happy I fulfilled your desires even from afar. Looks like I’ve had a beautiful career in seduction," Katya added, amused, as he walked to the farthest seat in the room, like he didn’t want to sit close to Sergei.

Like he was terrified of what he would do with this man so close.

Sergei’s scent was comforting. His clothes were warm. But with the subtlety of the scent Katya had relied on for comfort for several hours, Katya didn’t trust himself not to want more. He couldn’t.

He wanted to drown in Sergei’s rainforest scent.

He wanted to be held by the man. To breathe him in. To never let go.

Yet his reality was a tad too different because he couldn’t allow Sergei the chance to think of him as a whore. It was just the one thing that would definitely ruin him.

"I asked your father about you, and he told me you were just a secretary he’d hired. You were a beauty in the storm that was tearing Frolo apart. Almost like the universe itself was apologizing for what Frolo was at the time.

"I only knew you as Romanov back then... then Yaro brought you home. Introduced you as his boyfriend," Sergei said fondly, like that was the greatest memory of his life.

Like he had starved so hard for affection, and he was forever going to stay holding onto that.

"What do you want, Vladimir? Come to tell me that I’m not a wh—" Katya said, and Sergei stared at him intently, so much so that Katya couldn’t even finish his own words.

"Don’t even think of finishing that word, little wolf," Sergei bit out lowly.

"What do you want?" Katya asked, not in the mood for Sergei’s trip down memory lane.

"I came to see a hurting friend, Solnyshka. I’m not here because I love you or because I wanna convince you of what you know is not the truth, lyubim," Sergei said, and Katya sighed.

This wasn’t what he had wanted for the evening.

Not like this.

But then again, a part of him had hoped Sergei would leave him the fuck alone so he would live his simple life on this farm and never have to go back to civilization.

Granted, he would be lonely as fuck, but he could always sneak back into that darn penthouse to steal Sergei’s clothes. It wasn’t that hard, right?

"Well, I’m not hurting. What he said was right. I knew you were forbidden and still didn’t stop myself from falling for you. I knew we’d never make sense and still allowed myself to hopelessly look forward to your breakfasts, your presence, your company.

"I should have stopped, but I didn’t want to. Do you get that? I could have stopped myself from falling for you, but I was selfish. I think I still am, what a shame," Katya snickered as if that was supposed to be the most shameful of confessions from him.

And it hurt because if these had been said in a different setting, Sergei would have probably malfunctioned at the information that Katya loved him that much. He would have been happy to see Katya dressed in his clothes, smelling like him.

But now... He couldn’t even be happy.

Because his Solnyshka was humiliated.

"I told myself I wouldn’t get close. That it was enough to see you at family gatherings. But you were too beautiful. Too perfect. You looked like someone I wanted to come home to every day.

"And in my selfishness, I began looking forward to seeing you. It wasn’t healthy, but I waited. Each day you clocked in to work, I’d smile and work too. Each day I saw you, I’d be glad I got myself out of bed.

"You made everything worth it. The long days. The happy days were mostly because of you. I should have stopped. But how do you stop loving someone who smells like home? Someone who makes life bearable?

"Someone whose smile brightened my day? How was I to stop loving you when you were the only reason I wanted to actually live instead of surviving for my son?" Sergei said.

Katya just stared like he was not sure he understood what the fuck Sergei was aiming at.

Maybe he knew but didn’t want to face it. Because what the fuck was he to say to that? Thank you? Good for you? What now?

"Vladimir—"

"You don’t have to believe me, or even trust me if you don’t want to. I’m... I’m not good at comforting people, Solnyshka. But I didn’t fall in love with you for what you could give me.

"I loved you before I even knew how to live. I know it could be wrong in the eyes of some people, but you’re all I care about right now," Sergei said, knowing so well there was a chance he wasn’t even getting through to Katya Romanov.

The omega was angry, and Sergei didn’t understand the first thing about emotions.

Maybe he should have asked Anya for tips first.

"This was a mistake," Katya grumbled, as he breathed in Sergei’s scarf to keep himself steady.

"I know," Sergei said, and Katya froze.

"What?"

"Falling in love with me was a mistake, Solnyshka. Me thinking that life would be worth living was a mistake because... Because you hate yourself for loving me," Sergei chuckled in defeat.

"What are you—"

"Maybe Irina was right," Sergei said, throwing his best friend into the fire, and Katya sat up at that name. It was almost like a trigger for him, even if Sergei didn’t know it yet.

Or maybe Sergei knew, and he was dangling Hail Marys, hoping something would help snap Katya out of his self-hate for simply letting himself feel shit.

"ABOUT. WHAT?" Katya gritted lowly suddenly.

"Yaroslav may be older now, but he’s still my son. So, me... Me falling in love with someone my son’s age is fucked up," Sergei said flatly, like it was the one fact he’d always believed.

"And you believed HER???"

"Well, you did run away from me because I made you feel like what Alek said about you was true," Sergei sighed, getting up.

"Vlad—"

"I’ll leave, Soln— Ka... Katya," Sergei said, and Katya flinched at his own name.

"What?"

"Your name is cleared. Your job is secure. You can have another week off before you come back to work. Anya will be your direct supervisor in case of anything," Sergei added, and Katya glared at him.

Really glared.

"Vladimir..."

"Goodnight, young Romanov," Sergei said before adding:

"Forgive me... for making you question your worth."

Then Sergei left.

He didn’t make it to the door, though, before he was pinned against the wall.