Will of chaos

POV 89:

When I woke up, I felt like everything was different, but my focus was first on my Laws. That’s when I noticed the change; there was a new Law that acts as the central point for all the others. Notifications also appeared in front of me.

Ding!

<[ All your [ Anomalies (Ascending Laws) ] were touched by Chaos, awakening your original Anomalous Nexus ]>

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<[ Your true [ Anomaly (Ascending Law) ] awakened as the [ Anomalous Chaos (Celestial Law) ] ]>

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<[ You believe the only original [ Anomaly (Ascending Law) ] from yourself as Primordial ]>

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<[ Your Entity [ Urd (Divine Law Entity) ] is greatly strengthened by your discovery ]>

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<[ An individual has been introduced to you by [ Zenos (□●●■■□●) ] and has taken upon themselves the responsibility of Guardian of their [ Anomalous Chaos (Celestial Law) ] ]>

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<[ The System looks at you ]>

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<[ The System congratulates you for taking a place in the natural cycle as the second point of support for the [ Anomalies (Ascending Laws) ] ]>

“Celestial Law…” (me)

I was surprised by the notifications appearing in front of me and didn’t notice when someone appeared before me.

My mind was trying to understand what I was seeing and inside I was trying to comprehend what had changed.

“Relax and accept, then you won’t need to understand, because you will be the answer.” (Urd)

“…” (me)

She touched my forehead and her words seemed to resonate with my soul. I stopped trying to think or feel this power and simply relaxed.

That’s when it happened exactly as she said. I didn’t need to think or understand; it came to me as easily as breathing. It was something so primal within me, as if it had always been a part of me.

When I opened my eyes, I could see all the Laws, but they didn’t seem the same. I could see that they were all interconnected, not with the Flow of Laws. It was different this time.

The Flow of Laws was the path through which the Ascending Laws travel together, but this was different. I could see where all the Ascending Laws originate and disappear, the beginning and the end of all the Ascending Laws. This was me. All the Ascendants seemed to exist within my power, and I felt myself walking beside her, Urd.

When I opened my eyes again, she was there looking at me, but her eyes weren’t smiling. I could see the worry and a hint of disapproval in the glint of her eyes.

“Madam…” (me)

“You don’t need to say anything, just don’t do that again!” (Urd)

“The situation might have been serious, but it wasn’t so urgent for you to push yourself so far beyond your limits!” (Urd)

“I understand, I’m sorry for worrying…” (me)

Before I could finish speaking, she hugged me. The warmth of her body was so relaxing, her aura seemed so kind. I felt so safe that tears began to fall from one of my eyes. I didn’t understand why.

Suddenly I felt something else connected to me. It was as if Urd’s hug had awakened my attention to another aspect. I felt someone opening their eyes. I felt as if something was protecting me, as if a will covered me like a shield that would remain for eternity.

Something about his presence made my hand tremble, and the tears in my eyes began to fall harder. I knew who it was; I always knew who it was.

———————-

It’s been two hours since I met Zenos. Seeing him with Urd was strange and enlightening at the same time; it was like seeing the entire Celestial Law in its complete state.

I was the Celestial Law, held in Urd’s loving hands as she walked right behind Zenos along a path beyond the stars—that was the image that formed in my mind.

I could also sense a Law within Zenos, a Law not connected to the Celestial Law. This Law was alive and seemed to look at me curiously; I didn’t know how to deal with it.

“Still thinking about Zenos?” (Freya)

“Yes.” (me)

I was now sitting on one of the branches of the Universal Tree. Lady Freya was sitting in front of me. I had a long conversation with her. It was fun to see the similarities between my power and hers. I learned a lot, and yet, the more I learned, the less I understood Lord Zenos.

“Zenos is Chaos… he may be in the natural cycle, but he is not part of nature, he is the one who distorts nature.” (Freya)

“Your fixation on him must be due to a similar effect.” (Freya)

“If your Celestial Laws are ordered, then he is the counterpoint to them, the lack of control from which order arises.” (Freya)

“…” (me)

“(That’s why his Law seemed alive…?)” (me)

“(I didn’t feel fear… I felt like… being looked at by a beast… without malice, fear or anything like that, it was just curiosity…)” (me)

Suddenly I understood the cycle of the Laws better and with that the Celestial Law within me seemed to pulsate, I was the Law, Urd was the Source and Cradle of all Laws, but it was Zenos who existed outside the Laws, opening a path through the nonexistent.

Sigh

“Thank you, may I come to you again?” (Me)

“Come whenever you want, your Laws are part of what my roots must order in this universe.” (Freya)

I stood up and opened my wings, wanting to understand more about my power, so I decided to return to the Temple of Urd; I felt comfortable there.

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After another hour of meditating, I open my eyes with a strange feeling that hasn’t gone away since I woke up. My eyes unconsciously turn in one direction.

“Should I go…?” (Me)

That question was directed only at me. I already know everything she did, I also understand what she did to me, but none of that matters so much. I can’t hate her. When I remember her, it only makes me want to cry, not sadness, but pity. Her eyes were always sad.

“Why should I hold back?” (Me)

Sigh

I sighed as I stood up, then walked over there. I had no plans and hadn’t thought about anything, I just felt I needed to find her, I needed to talk to her, so that’s what I did.

Stopping outside the room, I could feel her eyes looking at me just as I looked at her. The door and the room did little to obstruct our view, but even so, I could feel her aura once again enveloping my body, yet still avoiding touching me.

I wanted to open the door and go in, but she seemed unwilling to see me when the door lost all its openings, becoming a veritable wall.

“Don’t force me in, please.” (Me)

My words made the door return to normal and open. At that moment, I entered. I was unsure of what awaited me upon entering, but as soon as I stepped inside, I saw a universe surrounding me, a false, miniature universe.

I didn’t need directions; I could feel where she was, so I spread my wings and let the Celestial Law pull me to where she was. It was like being teleported, and soon I was in front of her.

Her body was different, her face also looked younger, but none of that mattered to me.

The first thing I looked at were her eyes; they were still the same eyes I had seen so many times, filled with endless sadness, an agony inherent to her at this moment.

I didn’t understand these emotions back then; I couldn’t even understand my own emotions, much less the emotions I observed in her, but now I began to understand.

“You don’t want to meet me?” (me)

“No, I don’t deserve this…” (Urak)

“You know who I am, don’t you?” (me)

“…” (Urak)

“…” (me)

I saw her hands trembling when I asked who I was; she knows, and that’s why she acts this way. I heard about her circumstances, and I also heard about the torture Zenos prepared specifically for her.

“Why did you accept this power if you can’t even look me in the eyes?” (me)

“This is the least I can do…” (Urak)

“All the ancient Ascended hate you.” (Me)

“And they should…” (Urak)

“The new Ascended Ones just want to stay away, they don’t hate you, they hate who they were in the past.” (Me)

“For most of them, they had no choice…” (Urak)

“Why don’t you answer the question?” (Me)

“Why do you keep running away with half-truths and avoid looking at me?” (Me)

“Are you going to run away forever? Are you going to reduce yourself to this insignificance instead of proudly taking this power of Celestial Law as is your due!?” (Me)

“…” (Me)

I was getting irritated by her reactions and words. This must be the first time I’ve gotten this angry, but I couldn’t help it. Something about how she behaves is making me feel this way. It was as if I were desperately trying to hold onto something that constantly slips from my hands.

“Stand up! Look at me!” (Me)

My words seemed to carry destructive power, her body trembling with each word, but even so, she stood up and looked at me. Deep in her eyes, I could see the happiness submerged in that persistent agony.

I walked towards her, one step at a time. She took a step back before I looked seriously at her, preventing her from further retreating. When I was close enough, I stretched out my arm to cup her face in my hand. She tried to avoid my hand, but I persisted, and on the third time, I touched her face, tears beginning to flow from her eyes.

“In every sense, you are my mother and I am your son… don’t run away from me… don’t look away… don’t be afraid to face me!” (Me)

“I don’t deserve to be called that…” (Urak)

“You took on the role of Guardian of Celestial Law, and we both know it wasn’t because of Urd or the Ascended!” (Me)

“You chose to be trapped in a Guardian position forever because of me! Didn’t you!?” (Me)

“Yes…” (Urak)

“Then let’s end this game of prey and predator, stop running away and talk to me, I deserve at least this consideration from my mother!” (Me)

“…” (Urak)

Tears Tears