What Should I Do If I Find Out My Wife Is the Pope?
Chapter 168: Your Holiness, Aren’t You Relying on Me a Bit Too Much?
Translation by: Weebsread👹
The sudden news nearly startled Veya out of her seat.
Fortunately, the “Pope mode” she’d perfected from her very first day on the throne kicked in at just the right moment. Even in the face of crisis, it never failed her.
“I see. Understood,” she replied, composed as ever.
As expected of Her Holiness—was there truly nothing in this world that could shake her?
Secretary Rennie’s eyes shone with admiration at Veya’s calm, poised response, the same unwavering reverence she’d always held for the Pope. But when her gaze drifted toward Lin Wei, a flicker of confusion crept in.
Why is he in Her Holiness’s study too? Are they discussing secret plans behind my back again?
As of today, Lin Wei the adventurer would officially become an Honor Knight—equal in rank to the Vice Commander, answering only to the Pope herself. He was, in every sense, the “muscle” equivalent of Rennie’s own role. And from the looks of it, Her Holiness trusted him immensely. The pressure was suffocating.
I’d do anything for Her Holiness, but to have someone else take my place? Absolutely not! And lately, haven’t they been meeting far too often without me?
As Secretary, she’d always been the one closest to the Pope. Now, she could almost taste the bitterness of being set aside. This forced sharing, after so long as the sole confidant, felt unbearable.
What’s even worse is the thought that Her Holiness might start favoring Lin Wei over me—until one day, I’m left out of everything entirely.
If the legend of “the great Pope Selena and her ever-reliable Secretary” is rewritten as “the great Pope Selena and her Honor Knight Lin Wei,” I swear, I’ll bite Lin Wei to death outside the Holy See, even if I have to use my teeth!
“Demonic invasion...”
While Rennie’s mind spun with jealousy and anxiety, Selena had already finished reading the report.
As Rennie described, the intelligence had come from clergy stationed in the Northern Countries. Just two hours ago, a demon army had appeared deep within their territory.
The Northern Countries, focused on postwar reconstruction, had never expected a sudden attack, not even the faintest warning. They were caught completely off guard.
Although the Coalition Army responded swiftly—deploying mobile field troops to crush the invading force—the panic had already taken root in the hearts of the Northern Countries’ people.
Now, droves of refugees were fleeing toward the Empire’s border.
To prevent further chaos, the Coalition’s command had pulled back and begun investigating the origins of this demon army.
“Unknown numbers, unknown composition, and not a single trace after their defeat,” Selena murmured, frowning in deep thought. “The Northern Fortress is sealed tight. So where did this force even come from?”
Veya’s brow furrowed. She was too far from the front lines to have any real sense of what was happening. The urgent, incomplete battle report only made things murkier.
A small demon force showing up in the Northern Countries wasn’t unheard of. But to incite this level of panic—enough to force the field army’s deployment? Something didn’t add up.
How should we handle this?
A spark of inspiration flashed in her eyes.
“Sir Lin Wei, what’s your take?”
Unable to puzzle it out herself, Veya decisively handed the report to Lin Wei, her tone steady and unruffled. Anyone listening would think the Pope had already devised a perfect solution and was merely testing her subordinate.
“Me?” Lin Wei echoed, surprised by the sudden reliance.
He glanced at his wife—outwardly regal, inwardly pleading for help—and couldn’t help but smile as he accepted the file. He didn’t mind solving her problems at all.
The report was brief, just a summary from the front lines. There weren’t enough details for anything but speculation.
“I think, before we get more thorough intel from the front lines, our real priority should be dealing with the refugee crisis.”
Under the Pope’s confident gaze, Lin Wei raised his head and spoke with earnest conviction, sharing his not-quite-fully-formed idea.
“The Coalition Army can handle the Northern Countries’ problems. But once those refugees cross into the Empire’s borderlands, there’s bound to be friction with the border garrisons. As the ones who spread light and justice, we can’t just sit on our hands.”
He hesitated, then added, “To put it bluntly, this is an opportunity for the Holy See.”
Rennie, who’d been sulking just moments ago, found herself drawn in by his analysis. She’d never heard such a clear, step-by-step breakdown in the Pope’s study before. Her curiosity was piqued despite herself.
“An opportunity?” Selena’s voice was low and dignified, but she nodded, encouraging him to continue.
“It’s simple,” Lin Wei said. “The people of the Northern Countries have always had diverse faiths. After the demonic invasion, most of the smaller religions were wiped out—their legacies destroyed. In other words, there are many lost souls who can no longer even call upon their gods.”
No bluster, no grandstanding—just a sharp, precise observation. Even a random clergy member could guess where Lin Wei was going.
“So, the Holy See should send a large number of priests and sisters to the border to aid the refugees. At the same time, we should purchase and distribute supplies from the storerooms and border regions.”
“Meanwhile, the Office of the Holy Oracle needs to publish reports—spreading Her Holiness’s decisions through the newspapers, alongside the radiance of Alicia the Goddess. Of course, some citizens of the Empire may not understand why the Holy See is helping outsiders. So the articles must explain that Alicia’s light knows no borders or races. As long as one believes in the Goddess and carries light in their heart, the Holy See will share its gentle radiance with them. Oh, and we’ll need to address the tax issue while we’re at it.”
Solutions and supporting measures spilled out of him effortlessly. He barely had to think—the answers just fell into place.
Veya found herself relaxing, nodding along, every inch the picture of a satisfied Pope. Rennie, watching, was awestruck by Selena’s apparent composure and omnipotence.
“All those tax-exemption policies the Holy See has issued in the past? The Empire and our own newspapers deliberately downplay them, and by the time they reach the lower ranks, the Imperial officials skim off whatever they like. This is the perfect chance to fix that.”
“First, we’ll have the Office of the Holy Oracle republish the tax-exemption decrees. Then, we’ll send clergy across the country to investigate. If any Imperial nobles are caught skimming or ignoring the policies, drag them out and deal with them publicly—make an example of them.”
“That way, the people of the Northern Countries will convert out of gratitude for the Holy See’s aid, and the citizens of the Empire will thank us for reducing their taxes. A true win-win. What do you think, Your Holiness?”
What do I think? How could I possibly find fault with any of that?
If only the Secretary weren’t here, Selena would have leapt up and thrown her arms around Lin Wei.
So this is what my husband is capable of? He unraveled a mess this complicated in just a few sentences.
Truth be told, if she’d been left to ponder it alone, she likely would have decided to help the refugees first. But using the opportunity for propaganda? That never would have occurred to her.
And ever since Lin Wei joined the Holy See, she’d noticed a strange dependency forming. Whenever he was around, she barely needed to think; just a little wheedling, and he’d solve everything on the spot.
At this rate, I’ll end up a useless little housewife! Unless... I could just hand the Pope’s job to Lin Wei and spend my days sipping tea and zoning out. The idea was disturbingly tempting.
“Excellent—handled perfectly.” Selena returned to her usual dignified self, nodding like an approving senior. A glimmer of praise flickered in her eyes.
“In that case, we’ll proceed as Sir Lin Wei suggested. Secretary, notify all the Holy See’s branches in the borderlands to open their storerooms and send the supplies out for redistribution. Tell the Office of the Holy Oracle to start publishing articles about our relief efforts, beginning immediately.”
“Yes, Your Holiness!” Rennie’s confidence was instantly restored. Logistics and paperwork—this was her domain! Lin Wei might be brilliant, but she’d been Secretary for two years. She wasn’t without her own talents. Just watch me handle the resource allocation in record time.
“Make sure to assign the article writing to Peri, the intern from the Office of the Holy Oracle. Oh, and I promised her a permanent position after she wrote that expose on Duke Ous’s crimes. Your Holiness, may I confirm her promotion?”
An intern, promoted? No one had ever asked her about that before.
Veya blinked at Lin Wei’s unexpected question, then quickly caught herself and nodded. “No problem—those who contribute deserve recognition. Promote her, Secretary.”
“Yes, ma’am!”
Peri, the intern from the Office of the Holy Oracle. Rennie silently committed the name to memory, then strode out to handle her daunting task.
The study, lively just moments before, soon fell silent again.
After a brief pause, Veya, realizing no one else was around, let out a long breath. This time, she didn’t collapse onto the sofa, but tried to maintain her regal bearing as she addressed her husband in a frosty tone.
“Your strategy just now wasn’t half bad. I’ll give you that.”
“Well, thank you for your praise, Your Holiness,” Lin Wei replied, grinning.
“Speak like a normal person!” she snapped.
Lin Wei rapped his knuckles lightly on her head. The haughty Pope act crumbled as she squirmed away from his hand, finally giving up and clutching her head in mock defeat.
“Alright, alright! My Lin Wei is the best, okay?”
“Be careful someone might walk in. If anyone saw us like this, I’d lose my Pope’s seat for sure!”
“Heh, woman... Do you really need to say I’m the best out loud?” Lin Wei teased, glancing at Veya’s blank expression—she clearly didn’t get the joke. He sighed. This world’s lack of meme culture was tragic.
“Anyway, enough fooling around. Let’s talk business.”
Veya straightened up, her expression serious once more.
“The measures I mentioned just now—all of them can be implemented as planned. But the tax issue... Even if the Holy See publishes the decrees again and tries to intimidate those nobles, do you really think the Imperial nobles will just roll over? If they did, I’d suspect they’d been possessed by something strange.”
“So, you handle it for now. If there’s any Lord you can’t deal with, I’ll take care of them myself when I get back. It’s no big deal.”
Everything sounded reasonable—until that last part. Veya froze, then realized something was off.
“You’ll take care of it when you get back? Wait, where are you going?”
After all the trouble I went through to bring you to the Holy See, can’t you just stay and keep me company? If you leave, my work performance is going to nosedive again!
“Obviously, to the borderlands.”
Just how dependent is this woman on me?
Lin Wei chuckled inwardly, but the matter was serious enough that he pressed on.
“The demon attack on the Northern Countries is suspicious, no matter how you look at it. Distributing the Holy See’s supplies is important too. To keep everything aboveboard, we need someone reliable and strong to oversee the operation in person. I just happen to be free, so unless you have a better candidate, I’ll go myself.”
And besides, I should check on those subjugation squads I buried up north.
He kept that last thought to himself. His earlier plan to check on them had been derailed by the village massacre. Now, with a genuine demonic invasion and a refugee crisis, there was a real chance that some hero might awaken a special blessing in the chaos—unfreezing the subjugation squad members and parading them through the Imperial Capital in a furious mob. Just imagining it was enough to give anyone chills.
“And the fact that the demons bypassed the Northern Fortress to strike deep into the Northern Countries? No matter how you look at it, it’s suspicious. I need to see for myself.”
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