Chapter 148: Dream Babies

Naomi’s smile faded slightly. "Yeah. Who knew?"

"What’s wrong?"

Naomi sighed and wrapped both hands around her coffee cup. "It’s... it’s Dorian and... and his family, but especially Dorian."

"Did he do something wrong? Are they harassing you?"

"Quite the contrary, Tessa. His family are just... so welcoming. So sweet. And my goodness, Dorian is..." She stopped, already frustrated with herself. "He is just perfect." Naomi threw up one hand. "How can anyone be perfect?" She buried her face in both hands and groaned.

"Why is that a problem?"

Naomi slowly lowered her hands. "Can’t you see?"

"No, actually. Most women don’t usually look this distressed because their husband is treating them too well."

"That’s because most women probably aren’t operating with an expiration date! All of this ends in four months. It feels like I’ll be walking away from the best thing that has happened to me my entire life."

"Are you in love with him?"

Naomi’s head snapped up. "No. Heavens, no. I... I can’t afford that." She leaned forward, suddenly desperate to explain. "Because then everything changes. I fall in love and then things he would do begin to hurt me deeply, or he changes and begins taking me for granted. Things that shouldn’t matter suddenly matter because I gave him that kind of power."

"And then what? I’m trapped caring more than I should while waiting for the person I fell in love with to become someone else?" Naomi shook her head. "It’s not that, you know me."

"Yes, sadly, I know you," Tessa sighed.

Naomi narrowed her eyes at her. "Rude."

Tessa took another sip of her tea. "Do you plan on telling him?"

"Tell him what? ’Hi, Dorian, remember our very clear six-month arrangement? Well, surprise, I don’t want to divorce you anymore?’" She rolled her eyes dramatically and dropped back in her chair. "Uggghhhh... Tessa, it’s killing me!"

"The other day, I was literally daydreaming about kids with him. Kids, Tessa. Tiny Heathcliffes running around that gigantic house. Who does that?"

Tessa’s mouth twitched. "Someone in love?"

Naomi glared at her. "You’re not helping."

Tessa leaned forward. "Naomi, have you ever stopped to consider that maybe the problem isn’t that you’re incapable of loving someone? Maybe you just don’t want to admit that loving someone means being vulnerable, and vulnerability scares the hell out of you."

"I don’t love Dorian," Naomi insisted. "I assure you. I’m just..." she struggled for the right words. "I feel safe with him. I feel comfortable. I like being around him. I miss him when he’s not there. I like his family. I like his stupid giant house now, which is honestly offensive because who needs six floors?"

"I feel everything I should probably feel, except that."

"Except love."

"Yes. And Oh, the seeeeeeeeexxxxxx..." She dropped forward again until her forehead nearly hit the table and groaned into her arms. "It’s ridiculous. Completely unreasonable. No human being needs to be that good at anything."

"You’re glowing, babe."

"I hate you." Naomi lifted her head.

"Do you realize that since we’ve been sitting here, you’ve talked more about Dorian than everything currently blowing up in your life?"

Naomi paused. "I have? No, I haven’t."

"You were talking about him on the way here. You barely took a breath. And then we sat down, and somehow your viral speech became about Dorian. And now we are still talking about Dorian."

Naomi stared down at her coffee.

That was annoyingly difficult to argue with.

"Like I said, he is perfect," she muttered. "Every woman’s dream man."

Tessa tilted her head. "So why did he get divorced three times?"

Naomi looked up immediately. "It’s complicated." She knew enough now to understand that each marriage had its own disaster attached to it.

Lillian and the betrayal with Alistair.

Margot and the emotional distance Dorian had created after what Lillian did.

Camille had been rushed to make partner and he quickly realised it was going to be a nightmare.

Dorian wasn’t innocent in everything, but Naomi also knew the easy public version of Serial Husband destroys marriages was far too simple.

Tessa stared at her then slowly smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Tessa."

Tessa folded her arms. "Now you are making excuses for him."

"It’s not an excuse..." Naomi tried to defend herself.

"It is. Something has to be wrong somewhere, Naomi, for that to happen three times."

Annoyingly, Tessa had a point.

Tessa leaned forward over the table. "Look, maybe you need a breather from him. Proper time away, so you can actually confront whatever this is without Dorian standing there clouding your thoughts and being sexually devastating. They do say you don’t know what you have until it’s gone."

"If you truly miss him and it hurts to be away from him," Tessa continued, "then I’m sorry, Naomi, you are in love."

Naomi’s eyes lifted slowly.

Then narrowed.

"Is that why you’re back with Jordan?"

"What?"

Naomi held her gaze. "Tessa, I know. You don’t have to hide it from me."

Tessa groaned and dropped her head slightly. "How did you know?"

"I heard his voice when I called you on Saturday night. And last night, I drove to the apartment first. You weren’t there. Then when I called you, you said you were home."

Tessa winced. "I’m sorry."

Naomi shook her head. "You don’t have to apologize to me."

"I just thought you wouldn’t understand."

That hurt a little.

Tessa wrapped both hands around her cup. "I have this baby coming, and he promised it wouldn’t happen again. I just..." she exhaled. "I love him."

Naomi nodded slowly. "I know."

Tessa gave a humorless little laugh. "I know I am not exactly a shining example of what love is supposed to look like right now, but it’s... complicated."

"I’m not judging, babe. I just want you to be happy."

"I will be. It’s a slow process. We’re not exactly back where we were."

Naomi reached across the table and touched her hand. "As long as you’re not pretending nothing happened."