Chapter 152 — What’s With That Smile?

Chapter 152: Chapter 152 — What’s With That Smile?

~ Raven ~

"What’s with that stupid smile on your face?"

Raven blinked and slowly came back to the infirmary.

For a few seconds, she had forgotten the three girls sitting around her bed entirely.

Thalia was perched near the foot of it, Tessa had dragged the spare chair closer, and Brielle stood with one shoulder against the wall, all three of them looking at her as though they had been waiting for her to return from somewhere very far away.

Raven frowned. "What smile?"

That only made Thalia’s mouth twitch.

"You’ve been staring at absolutely nothing for the past few seconds."

"I was thinking."

"Clearly."

Raven ignored her and adjusted the blanket over her legs, although the movement did nothing about the warmth creeping into her face.

She had been thinking.

Unfortunately, the subject had been Cassian.

Little bird.

Raven pressed her lips together.

No.

She was not doing this again.

"What were you saying?"

Tessa stared at her. "We asked how you were feeling."

"Oh."

"Twice."

Raven sighed and finally gave them her full attention. "I’m better. The dizziness is gone, and I don’t feel like I’m going to crawl out of my own skin anymore."

That seemed to satisfy Tessa and Thalia.

Brielle remained unusually quiet.

Raven noticed after a moment that she wasn’t looking at her anymore. Her attention had dropped to her own hands, and there was something stiff in the way she held herself that made Raven’s smile fade.

She knew what was coming before Brielle spoke.

"About yesterday."

The room settled.

Brielle shifted her weight away from the wall and looked at Raven properly, clearly hating every second of what she was about to say.

"I shouldn’t have used my pressure on you."

Raven waited.

Brielle’s jaw tightened slightly. "I was angry, but that doesn’t excuse it. You hit the bedpost because of me, and I shouldn’t have let it get that far."

It was probably the most uncomfortable apology Raven had ever watched anyone give.

Brielle looked like she would have preferred another argument.

That almost made Raven smile again.

"I was angry too," Raven said. "And I’m still not going to pretend what you did was fine."

"I know."

"But I don’t want us walking around pretending the other person doesn’t exist either."

Some of the tension left Brielle’s shoulders.

"It won’t happen again."

Raven believed her.

She studied her for another second, then opened both arms.

Brielle frowned.

Raven kept them there.

"What?"

"No."

Raven’s smile widened. "Come here."

"I apologized."

"Yes."

"That was the entire purpose of this conversation."

"And now we hug."

Brielle looked toward Tessa and Thalia as though expecting support.

Neither offered any.

Thalia was already grinning.

Brielle muttered something under her breath that Raven was fairly certain involved the word ridiculous, then finally stepped closer.

Raven caught her around the shoulders before she could make it a miserable half-hug and pulled her in properly.

Brielle went rigid for all of two seconds before relaxing enough to return it.

"There," she muttered. "Happy?"

"Much."

That should have been the end of it.

Instead, Thalia came in from one side and Tessa from the other, and Raven suddenly found herself trapped in the middle of all three of them.

"Wait—"

Someone squeezed her ribs.

Raven yelped.

"I am still recovering!"

Thalia laughed against her shoulder, while Brielle tried to pull free and somehow made the entire thing worse.

By the time they finally separated, Raven was half laughing, half complaining and trying to fix the blanket they had nearly dragged off the bed.

For the first time since waking in the infirmary, everything felt normal.

Then Thalia looked at her again with a slow smile making its way onto her face.

Raven recognized that expression immediately.

"No."

Thalia leaned back on her hands. "Sooo...Cassian was here for quite a while."

Raven’s fingers stopped on the blanket.

"So?"

"So nothing."

"Good."

Tessa looked between them, then at Raven.

Raven felt the heat arrive before either of them said another word.

Tessa’s eyebrows rose.

"Oh."

Raven glared at her. "Don’t."

Thalia’s smile grew. "What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"With Cassian?"

"Yes, Thalia. That is usually what nothing means."

That should have ended it.

Unfortunately, Thalia stared at her for another second before asking, "Did he kiss you, Raven?"

Raven’s eyes widened.

The blanket was over her face before she realized what she was doing.

There was a beat of complete silence.

Then all three girls started talking at once.

"Oh, Goddess—"

"Raven!"

"What the hell are you doing?"

"He did not kiss me!"

Her voice came muffled through the blanket.

That did absolutely nothing to help.

Thalia sounded delighted now, Tessa was laughing, and even Brielle had apparently decided Raven’s suffering was more entertaining than dignified silence.

Raven stayed beneath the blanket until the heat in her face became unbearable.

Then she dragged it down and glared at them.

"Nothing happened."

Nobody believed her.

That was fine.

She wasn’t telling them anything.

She crossed her arms, ready to leave it alone, but after a moment Cassian’s words came back to her.

Not the teasing or the laughter.

What he had said before that.

Raven looked down at her hands.

"If a man says something because of a mate bond..."

The room went quiet.

She immediately regretted beginning.

Thalia leaned forward. "Says what?"

"Nothing specific."

Three expressions told her exactly how convincing that was.

Raven exhaled sharply. "I’m asking generally. If a man says he wants someone, how do you know whether that is actually him talking or just his wolf reacting to the bond?"

For a moment, nobody answered.

Raven wished she could pull the blanket back over her head without making the situation worse.

Thalia was the first to recover.

"Who said they wanted you?"

"That is not what I asked."

"Raven."

"It was a hypothetical question."

Brielle snorted.

Raven looked at her.

"What?"

"You’re terrible at hypothetical questions."

Tessa smiled but gave Raven a little mercy. "The bond matters. The wolf matters too. But that doesn’t mean everything a person feels comes from it."

Brielle nodded. "A wolf can push. It can want. It can make things harder to ignore. It still doesn’t make the man say something he doesn’t mean."

Raven looked away.

Cassian had not looked uncertain when he said it.

He had not been struggling with his wolf or sounding as though the words had escaped by accident.

He had simply looked at her and answered.

You.

Raven’s face warmed again.

Thalia noticed.

Raven reached for the blanket.

"Don’t," Tessa warned, already laughing.

Raven ignored her and pulled it halfway over her head anyway.

They eventually let the matter go, although all three of them were still smiling when she emerged.

It was Thalia who finally asked what had actually happened before Raven ended up in the infirmary.

That killed the remaining amusement quickly enough.

Raven told them what Cassian had told her.

By the time she finished, Brielle had gone very still, her expression flattening in a way Raven was starting to recognize as a bad sign.

"They drugged you?"

"Yes."

"And they’re still walking around the academy?"

"For now."

Brielle’s jaw tightened.

"Cassian confronted them already," Raven added. "Whatever happened, he made it clear they were finished."

"That doesn’t mean they dealt with what they did to you."

"I know."

Raven looked down at the blanket.

"I’m not letting it go. I just want to handle it myself."

Brielle didn’t look thrilled by that answer, but she didn’t argue.

Thalia was quieter.

"Why did you sit with them in the first place?"

Raven hesitated, then decided there was no point hiding that part anymore.

"Isolde."

Tessa frowned. "Marchmont?"

"I needed to speak to her. Adelaide said the Circle could arrange it."

The reaction was immediate, though subtle.

Thalia glanced toward Tessa.

Tessa looked at Brielle.

Raven noticed.

"What?"

Brielle frowned. "Isolde has nothing to do with them."

Raven stared at her.

"What do you mean?"

"She doesn’t attend their meetings," Tessa said. "She barely tolerates the Circle at all."

For a few seconds, Raven said nothing.

Then Adelaide’s voice returned with perfect clarity.

She’s First Seat, Rivers. Who else would lead it?

Raven felt her stomach sink.

"Oh."

Thalia watched her carefully.

Raven’s expression hardened.

"Oh, that fucking bitch."

They had known exactly what they were doing.

She had thought she was using them to reach Isolde.

Instead, they had used Isolde to get her where they wanted her.

Raven leaned back against the pillows, furious at how obvious it seemed now.

"Why do you need to speak to Isolde?" Brielle asked.

Raven looked at her.

That was harder.

Stillheart.

The Dreamwalker.

The headaches.

For one second, she wanted to tell them everything simply because she was tired of carrying it alone.

Then she remembered why she couldn’t.

"I can’t tell you."

Brielle frowned again, but Raven continued before the old argument could return.

"It isn’t about the Court, and it isn’t because I don’t trust you. There’s something I need to find out, and until I know more, I think telling other people could make it worse."

Tessa studied her. "For you?"

"For more than just me."

That was enough to make them quiet.

Raven rubbed her thumb across the edge of the blanket.

"I know I handled the Circle badly. I should’ve told you why I was going, or at least told you there was a reason. I’m not asking you to pretend that was fine. I’m just asking you to trust me on this part."

Brielle still looked unhappy, but there was no anger in it this time.

Thalia nodded first.

Tessa followed.

"Just don’t disappear into another secret gathering without telling us," she said.

Raven gave her a tired smile. "I’ve learned my lesson."

"Have you?"

"No."

That got a small laugh from Thalia.

The tension finally eased.

They drifted into talking about when Raven might be allowed out, whether she had missed anything important and what they were going to eat once she returned to Hale Wing.

After a while, Thalia grew quieter.

She looked toward Raven.

"There’s something I wanted to tell you."

Raven turned.

"What?"

The infirmary door opened before Thalia could continue.

The nurse entered carrying a small tray and stopped when she saw the four of them gathered around the bed.

"I see resting has become a social event."

Raven smiled faintly. "Apparently."

The next few minutes disappeared into another examination.

The nurse checked her pulse, her eyes, asked about the lingering heat and dizziness, then made Raven stand beside the bed long enough to make sure she could do it without falling over.

Finally, she seemed satisfied.

"You may return to Hale Wing."

Raven nearly smiled.

"No training tonight, plenty of food, and if the dizziness comes back, you return here immediately."

"We’ll make sure she does," Tessa said.

Raven frowned. "I can look after myself."

Brielle gave her a look.

"You hid under a blanket because someone mentioned Cassian."

Raven stared at her.

Thalia started laughing again.

Traitor.

By the time Raven changed and gathered the few things beside the bed, she was more than ready to leave.

The four of them headed back toward Hale Wing together, with Thalia already talking about food and Tessa insisting Raven would eat whatever they had saved whether she wanted it or not.

For once, Raven had no intention of arguing.

She wanted her bed.

She wanted something warm to eat.

Most of all, she wanted one evening in which nobody drugged her, accused her of something, entered her dreams or asked what Cassian Blade had said to make her hide beneath a bedsheet like an idiot.

They reached the main student corridor.

A conversation near the windows stopped.

Raven noticed without looking directly at them.

Then another group fell quieter as they passed.

Her shoulders tightened.

She kept walking.

A few words carried anyway.

"Petra Voss..."

"...the recording..."

Raven’s steps slowed for half a second.

Of course.

Being taken to the infirmary had not erased what happened in the cafeteria, and Cassian confronting the people responsible had not magically told the rest of the academy what was true.

She could already feel the eyes following her.

Brielle glanced toward her, as though checking whether she wanted to turn back.

Raven lifted her chin.

"No."

Brielle raised an eyebrow.

Raven looked toward Hale Wing at the far end of the corridor.

"Let’s go."

Then she kept walking.