Chapter 52: My System Showed Me a Screen It Had Never Shown Me Before

"Eighty days. It’s time you saw the full accounts."

The blue window opened on its own at three in the morning, while I was looking at a city map with four streets marked and no certainty at all.

[HERO, may I show you something?]

"You may."

[I hadn’t opened it because the numbers were ugly.]

[Now two of them aren’t.]

"Has this existed the whole time?"

[Since the eleventh of January.]

"Eighty days."

[Eighty days.]

[I show you a line when a line moves. I’ve never shown you the sheet.]

"Why not?"

[Because for seventy eight of those days the only column that changed was the one going down, and a man who sees a full ledger of losses stops opening ledgers.]

[I’ve watched people stop opening ledgers, HERO. From inside a man who signed anything put in front of him.]

[INVESTMENT PORTFOLIO. Hero System v0.7]

[Lunara Marr ....... Capital: 4 · Return: x1,840 · Position: OPEN]

[Zelina Flintstone .... Capital: 2 · Return: x1,100 · Position: OPEN]

[Calista Bloom ..... Capital: 1 · Return: no record · Position: UNOPENED]

[Miralys Fae ....... Capital: 3 · Return: x1,000 · Position: OPEN]

[Saoirse Wynne ..... Capital: 3 · Return: x100 · Position: OPEN]

[Integrity: 31%]

I looked at the third line longer than it takes to read a dash.

"Why is Calista still unopened?"

[Because you’ve never invested in her.]

"I’ve done things for Calista."

[You’ve done things for Calista.]

[You’ve never calculated one of them.]

[That’s why there’s no return. And it’s why her line is the only one that hasn’t cost me a point of integrity in eighty days.]

"Explain the capital."

[What they put in first. Not what you put in.]

[Lunara put in four. The sword, the name, the Marr order, and the oath in front of the Council.]

[Miralys put in three in eleven days.]

[Calista put in one. She told you her name.]

"That was months ago."

[That is the only thing she has ever given you, and she gave it before you gave her anything.]

[That’s why her capital is one and her return is empty. You’ve never collected on her.]

Eighty days appraising five women the way you appraise a portfolio, and the one I never put a number on is the one that came free.

"So what does that mean?"

[That if I ever open her position, I’ll know you’ve started calculating her.]

[I’d rather never open it.]

"And the other four?"

[The other four are open and they don’t close.]

[That isn’t a punishment. It’s a description.]

"Explain."

[With Lunara you calculated the oath. With Zelina you calculated the written apology. With Miralys you calculated the maps. With Saoirse you calculated the delegation.]

[All four came off. All four cost you.]

[And all four still want you the same, HERO, which is the part I don’t know how to record.]

"Then what’s the portfolio for?"

[So you can see what you’ve built.]

[I’ve spent eighty days telling you what you lose. Tonight I wanted to show you the other column.]

"Why tonight?"

[Because tomorrow you go looking for a house with four streets marked and no certainty, and I know how you decide things at three in the morning.]

"How do I decide things at three in the morning?"

[Badly. You reach for the clean play.]

[Every time you’ve lost a point since March, it was between two and five.]

"That’s a real pattern."

[That’s forty seven entries and I checked them twice.]

[HERO, I’m not showing you the portfolio to make you feel better. I’m showing it to you before the hour when you stop looking at it.]

I went down to the kitchen garden at four because I wasn’t going to sleep.

Calista was there, kneeling among the winter lettuces with a lamp on the ground.

"It isn’t the hour for weeding."

"I’m not weeding." She sat back on her heels. "I’m counting how many survive the cold. Three years doing it and I still guess wrong."

I sat on the bench, which at that hour was wet.

"He ate at the table," she said.

"Roderic?"

"Last night and tonight. The second time he served himself." She pulled something out of the ground and threw it away. "Zelina set the plate down in front of him without a word, and he ate it without checking who put it there."

"Is that good?"

"That’s a man who’s spent seven years waiting to see who eats first." She wiped her hands. "Yes. It’s good."

"Did he talk?"

"Twenty minutes with Saoirse about matrices." She moved the lamp. "And with Miralys about horses, which is the only thing he actually knows."

"And with Lunara?"

"Lunara asked him about his guard in the sixth pass and he went red." She pulled a bad leaf. "Not cruelty. She asks those things."

"And Zelina?"

"Zelina watched him eat." She sat back. "Forty minutes. Without a word."

"That doesn’t sound good."

"That’s Zelina taking notes." She wiped her hands on her apron. "Vaelion, she’ll get to whatever there is on her own. It’s a matter of weeks."

"Is that a warning?"

"That’s a date." She moved the lamp again. "You asked me once what I’d do if what I know put us all in danger. I’m telling you the calendar so you don’t have to ask twice."

"And when Zelina gets there?"

"Then it won’t be mine anymore and I’ll be glad." She sat back on her heels. "Vaelion, keeping something for somebody is not the same as owning it. I’ve done it eleven years and I still hate every night of it."

"Calista."

"Say it."

"What happened in that room?"

She lifted her head and held my eyes long enough for me to understand the answer before I heard it.

"Nothing that’s mine," she said.

"It’s my house."

"It’s your house and he’s your guest and neither of those changes what I just told you." She went back to the lettuces. "Eleven years of hearing confessions, Vaelion. If I start handing them out by rank, I stop being any use at this."

"And if what you know puts him in danger?"

"Then I’ll be standing in the middle."

"And if it puts us in danger?"

She stopped there.

"Then I’ll tell you," she said. "And I’ll decide when, and I won’t enjoy it, and I’ll do it anyway."

A mediator learns to recognize when the other side has set a real limit. There’s no raised voice and no threat. There’s a short sentence and the certainty that it holds.

"All right," I said.

"All right?"

"All right." I got up off the wet bench. "I’ve spent eighty days negotiating with everyone in this palace. It’s strange to have somebody tell me no and not want to counteroffer."

[DING]

[Investment tracking: negative.]

[No action registered.]

[Integrity: 31% ▲ 32%]

[Calista Bloom position: UNOPENED.]

[Good.]

I sat back down on the wet bench and stayed there while she counted lettuces.

"How many survived?" I asked.

"Nine of nineteen."

"Is that good?"

"It’s better than last year and worse than the year before, and I have no idea why either time." She put the lamp out. "That’s the whole job. You put things in the ground and you count what comes back and you don’t get told the reason."

"That’s a miserable job."

"It’s the only honest one I’ve had." She stood and brushed her knees. "Go to bed, Vaelion. Whatever’s in that map will still be there at seven."

"It moves at seven."

"Then go to bed until six."