Chapter 152

Merrick’s POV

The corridor outside Terrell’s chambers had become, over the last several hours, my new dwelling place.

I had been pacing it since mid-morning with the energy of a man who had a lot to say. The window at the end of the corridor let in the noon light at an angle that told me that it was almost noon, and Terrell had been wherever Terrell was since three days ago...

No. Two days.

Two days and this morning.

Which was nearly three.

I turned at the wall and came back the other way.

Gareth had told me that the Alpha was in a different bedchamber with the Luna and had asked not to be disturbed. He had conveyed this with a slight shock that communicated I have served this Alpha for many years and this is new territory for both of us.

I had taken over the pack’s daily operations with the resigned efforts of a man who had his own castle and his own duties and was nevertheless standing in someone else’s place attending to someone else’s responsibilities because the someone else was indisposed in a bedchamber.

Two days.

Nearly three.

I respected it. I genuinely did. I had watched Terrell exist all throughout his life in loneliness. The clear loneliness of a man who had not yet found what was supposed to be his, and if he had now found it - if Angel was that, and she clearly was - then I respected every hour he was choosing to spend in that bedchamber making up for lost time.

But I had things to discuss.

Urgent things.

Things that had been sitting in my chest for two days.

I turned at the window.

And felt her.

Before the footsteps. The awareness arrived first, the way it always arrived, without warning and without my permission...

Agnes came around the corner.

She saw me and her pace altered - like she’d encountered something she did not plan for and is adjusting her approach. She came forward anyway, and she stopped a few feet away with careful distance.

I stayed where I was.

"Were you looking for me?" I asked.

Something moved through her expression. "No," she said. Then: "I need to speak with Terrell."

I was surprised to hear this.

Agnes and Terrell in the same room voluntarily. Of her own seeking. Whatever had brought her to this corridor was not a small thing.

"Is it something I can help with?" I asked.

She met my eyes briefly. Looked away. "No."

"Agnes..."

"It’s not something I can discuss with you," she said. "Only Terrell. For the past two days I’ve not been able to reach him."

I looked at her.

I knew what this was about. I had known the moment I saw her in this corridor, the way she was currently avoiding my eyes and the memory of what she had said in that room two days ago.

I can’t do this to my sister.

"Does it have something to do with leaving?" I asked.

A pause.

She nodded. Once. Small.

Something in my chest tightened.

"Let me talk to him first," I said. "Before you do. Would you atleast give me that."

She shook her head. "I’ve made up my mind." She said it flatly. "Nothing is going to change it."

She walked past me to Terrell’s door.

She knocked.

"He’s not in his chambers," I said.

She turned.

"He’s in another bedchamber," I said. "With Angel."

I watched the color rise in her face, as she obviously guessed what’s been going on the last two days.

"Oh," she said. "I’ll come back later then," then she turned, and walked back the way she had come with unnecessary speed.

I watched her go.

I turned back to Terrell’s empty door.

Tomorrow, I thought. If he’s not out by the end of tomorrow, I’m going inside that bedchamber, and dragging him out.

The third morning arrived.

I was in my chambers dressing up. I had pack duties in an hour and I wondered how I was going to cope, considering how I’ve slept so poorly for three nights.

But just when I was organizing my thoughts, the doors opened.

I turned, already drawing breath for the speech about knocking...

Terrell walked in with his arms open.

"Brother," he said.

I stared at him.

He looked... different. Something in the way he moved, the way he occupied the room, the way his eyes looked, like it had sparkles in them.

He embraced me.

I stood in the embrace with my arms at my sides for a moment, too occupied with the shock of it to respond properly, and then I put my arms around him because he was my brother and he was happy and even the shock of that couldn’t override instinct.

He drew back.

He looked at my face.

And he laughed. A full-bodied, genuine, loud cheerful laugh. "You look like you’ve seen a ghost," he said.

"I..." I was still staring. "You’ve been in a bedchamber for three days, Terrell."

"I might as well be a ghost," he said, still laughing, "given the absence."

"Your pack duties," I said. "Which I have been attending to. While you were..."

"I know." He put both hands on my shoulders with the warmth of someone who has decided to be warm and is not going to be talked out of it. "I know, I know. I’m sorry. I’m back now. You’re relieved of everything. Go home and rest."

I looked at him.

I looked at my brother - Terrell, who had spent hundreds of years being cold and ruthless - and I tried to find the version I recognized underneath this one.

It was there.

But it had been moved to the back.

"Angel," I said slowly. "She did this."

He looked at me with an expression filled with more laughter.

"Love," he said simply, "conquers all."

I cleared my throat. "Right."

"You should try it sometime."

"Yes, well..." I began.

"Speaking of which." He settled into the chair near the window with the ease of a man in his own space. "I know you’ll most likely need your private time with Angel. I understand - it’s been weeks, you’ve been on the road, and you’re her husband too. But she needs to rest today, she’s..." He paused, and the expression that moved through his face was a happy one, one he was not even trying to conceal. "She wanted a baby. I spent three days making sure that wish was thoroughly addressed."

He said this with a smile, like he was relieving the memory.

"Tomorrow," he continued, "you can see her. You two can have your time, arrange things between you..."

"That’s not what I need to talk to you about," I said.

He looked at me.

Something in my tone had landed differently than the rest of the conversation. I watched him register it.

"Sit down, Merrick," he said. Quieter.

"I’m fine standing."

"You’re wearing a very serious face right now." He looked at me steadily. "What happened in the three days I was gone."

"Nothing happened," I said. "Or... things happened. Small things. Adjacent things." I stopped. I had been thinking about how to say this for two days and had not arrived at a version that was not awkward. I chose directness because it was the only tool I had ever actually trusted. "I want to discuss dissolving my marriage to Angel."

The room went quiet.

The happiness evaporated from Terrell’s face, replaced with shock. Surprise.

"Explain," he said.

"She and I..." I searched for the accurate words. "There is nothing between Angel and me that would be harmed by a dissolution. She knows it. I believe she would agree if asked." I held his gaze. "She is yours, Terrell. Whatever the three of us were arranged to be - she is yours in the way that matters. I think we both know that."

"Merrick..."

"I’m not saying it with resentment," I said. "I’m not - I’m not hurt by it. That’s the thing I need you to understand. I’m not coming to you broken. I’m coming to you with information." I looked at him directly. "Angel does not love me the way she loves you. And I don’t..." I stopped. "I don’t love her the way I should. Not in the way the marriage requires. You’ve always been by her side every single time she was hurt. Every single time, Terrell. You never leave until she’s okay, even though I’m right there."

Terrell was very still.

"Did something happen while I was gone," he said. "Is there someone else?"

The room held the question, and I looked at my brother. The expression on his face was something I had no words for.

"I think," I said carefully, "that I’m falling for someone."

The silence was a different kind this time.

Terrell looked hard at me.

I looked back.

"Who," he said.