Chapter 90: Three Against the World

Astrid

For a moment, nobody spoke. Reed had gone completely still, which I’d learned was never a good sign. Xander started pacing, three steps one way, then back, which was worse.

Finally Reed said, "You’re not going anywhere alone."

"Excuse me?"

"Finally," Xander said.

"Finally what?"

"Something he says I completely agree with."

I folded my arms. "I just finished telling you I don’t want to be treated like I’m fragile."

"And I listened," Reed said.

"Clearly not."

Xander held up a finger. "Someone sent you a threatening note." Another finger. "Someone sabotaged your team. Someone used another student’s identity. And now you’re seeing people who aren’t there."

"That sounds much worse when you list it like that," I said.

"Exactly," he said.

I turned to Reed. "You’re seriously agreeing with him?"

He didn’t answer immediately, which was answer enough.

I started walking. They followed.

"What exactly are you suggesting?" I asked, turning back.

"Until we understand what’s happening, you don’t go anywhere alone," Reed said.

"I have Ivy."

"Ivy isn’t always with you," Xander said.

"I have friends."

"Friends aren’t bodyguards."

"Neither are you," I said.

Silence. The words landed harder than I meant them to. Xander’s expression shifted, and Reed watched me quietly.

"You’re right," Reed said. "We’re not your bodyguards."

"Technically I could be," Xander said. Reed ignored him.

"But we’re also not going to pretend nothing is happening."

I looked away, because he was right, and I hated that. "I don’t want to disappear inside this," I said quietly.

"Inside what?"

"Us."

That quieted them both. I took a breath. "Everything changed so quickly. A few months ago I was just trying to survive Moonshade. I didn’t have a wolf. I didn’t have money. I didn’t even know where I belonged. And now I’m your mate." I looked down. "Sometimes it feels like everyone sees me as that before they see me as Astrid. I don’t want to become your mate and forget who I was before."

The silence that followed felt different. No anger. Just understanding settling in.

Xander spoke first, quieter than usual. "You think we want you because you’re easy to protect?"

"That’s not what I meant."

"Good." He stepped closer. "Because I didn’t fall for you when you needed saving. You insulted us."

"That’s your romantic argument?"

"I’m making a point. You fought with me."

"You fought with both of us."

"Mostly you," Reed said.

"I’m having a moment," Xander told him, and Reed’s mouth twitched.

"You made my life difficult," Xander said.

"You’re welcome," I said, smiling.

His expression softened. "You were Astrid before you were our mate. You don’t stop being her now."

I couldn’t speak for a second. I hadn’t realized how badly I needed to hear that from him specifically.

"Honestly," he added, "if you became less difficult, I’d probably be concerned."

I laughed, the tension finally breaking.

Reed stepped closer. "I’m not asking you to stop being independent. I’m asking you to stop carrying danger by yourself."

That was different. Subtle, but different.

"You don’t have to ask permission to leave your room," he said. "Or speak to your friends. Or investigate something."

"That sounds like you disapprove of the investigating."

"I do."

"Reed."

"But I’m not going to forbid it. Just tell us. If you get another note, tell us. If you see something strange—"

"Tell you."

"If you think you’re being followed—"

"Tell you."

"Immediately," Xander added.

"I was agreeing with him."

"I wanted emphasis."

"And in return," Reed said, "we don’t make decisions about you without you."

"Really?" I asked.

"Really," Xander said.

"Both of you?"

"Both of us."

"Unless you’re about to jump off a building," Xander said.

"I’m not going to jump off a building."

"Then we won’t have a problem."

Reed sighed. "Ignore him."

"Why does everyone keep saying that?" Xander asked.

I smiled. The argument was over, not because everyone got exactly what they wanted, but because we’d actually listened to each other.

Back at the apartment, I noticed how different it felt walking through the door now. No awkwardness, no forced proximity. I dropped my bag and sat on the couch.

Home, I thought, surprised by how easily the word came.

Xander walked past and dropped his head onto my lap without warning.

"What are you doing?"

"Being protected."

"From what?"

"You."

Reed laughed quietly. "Don’t encourage him," I said.

"I’m not," Reed said, though he was smiling.

Without thinking, I ran my fingers through Xander’s hair. He went still, and I froze too, trying to pull my hand back. He caught my wrist gently.

"Don’t stop now."

Something shifted in the room, warmth moving through the bond. I looked toward Reed, who was watching, not jealous, just present. I felt suddenly shy, ridiculous considering everything we’d already shared.

I kept my fingers moving through Xander’s hair, and reached toward Reed with my other hand. He hesitated only a second before leaning in, his arm coming around me naturally. No pressure. Just warmth.

This was exactly what I wanted. Not to be protected from everything.

Just to be here, because I’d chosen it.

My phone buzzed. A message from Eliza, asking us to meet tomorrow, all four of us.

Old me would have hidden it, waited, figured everything out before telling anyone. Instead I held up the phone.

"Eliza wants us to meet tomorrow."

"Us?" Reed asked.

"Me. Josh. Eliza. Criston."

Xander sat up, immediately suspicious. "Don’t start," I said.

"I didn’t say anything."

"Your face said enough."

"My face is very expressive."

"You’re telling us," Reed said.

"I’m telling you," I said, smiling.

"Thank you," Reed said.

"Don’t get used to it."

"Too late," Xander said.

Later, as we got ready to leave the apartment, I stopped between them.

"One more rule."

Both twins looked at me.

"No deciding what I can handle without asking me."

"Agreed," Reed said immediately.

"Fine," Xander sighed.

"And no following me around everywhere."

"That was never the plan," Xander said, offended.

Reed looked at him.

"Mostly," Xander amended.

I laughed. Reed shook his head, and we walked out together, Reed reaching for one of my hands, Xander taking the other.

I looked down at our joined hands and understood something. I’d spent most of my life believing strength meant doing everything alone. Maybe I’d been wrong.

Maybe being loved didn’t mean disappearing. Maybe the right kind of love, the kind that listened, the kind that argued honestly, the kind that let you walk beside it instead of behind it, made room for you to become more yourself, not less.

I squeezed both their hands gently.

Neither of them let go.