Ch. 237 - Hey, You Dropped Your Urea Bag [1]

"It's not like I want to cause trouble — the System is forcing me!"

Chen Shu wore a look of helpless resignation, but the corner of his mouth twitched with a smile he couldn't suppress.

With a flip of his right hand, a bottle of potion materialized in his grip. Inside, there was no liquid — instead, sealed within was a flickering yellow flame.

It was the Combustion Potion he'd obtained earlier.

Clearly, this wasn't meant for boosting power — it was yet another special-purpose potion.

If this had been the Explosion Potion, he definitely wouldn't dare use it in the center of Nancang City.

But the Combustion Potion was a different story.

There was still time before the end of the second round — more than enough for him to burn down one building.

Chen Shu left the hotel and made his way to the office building glowing with red light.

After some asking around, he learned that the entire building served as the offices of the Nancang Dingsheng Group.

One of the largest corporations in Nancang Province.

Who could have imagined it was actually a base for a criminal organization?

The building was still brightly lit — clearly, people were working overtime.

"Man, I really just want to torch this place!"

Chen Shu shook his head, his face practically glowing with excitement. But without evidence, he'd basically be opening the door to a life behind bars.

Couldn't go rushing toward a prison sentence that fast! [2]

Chen Shu rolled his eyes, then made a phone call.

"Yo, Old Xie! Brother's in trouble! Emergency!"

"One million."

"......"

Chen Shu's mouth twitched. "Who the hell taught you that? Money talk ruins friendships, man!"

"Yeah, but friendship talk ruins my wallet. A man's gotta eat!"

"Fine. Get your ass to Nancang City right now. I need to borrow your Winged Caterpillar."

"I'm busy studying. Don't have time. I'll just mail it — make sure you sign for it."

"???"

Chen Shu's eyes bulged. What kind of galaxy-brain logic was this?! You came up with mailing a living contract spirit?!

One day later, Chen Shu did indeed sign for the Winged Caterpillar...

For several days straight, Chen Shu kept up observation, like a patient hunter.

"Definitely something shady going on..."

Chen Shu had settled into a café across from the building, a cup of coffee in hand, his gaze locked dead onto the office tower.

Just then, his phone rang.

"Hello? Xiaoyu?"

"Chen Shu, where the hell are you?! Today's the opponent selection draw!"

"What opponent?"

Inside the Spirit Fighting Arena, Xu Xiaoyu's expression stiffened. She took a deep breath and said:

"The second round just ended. What the hell are you doing?"

The guy had actually forgotten about the competition entirely. What could possibly be more important than the tournament?

"I'm busy committing arson... uh... I mean, reconnaissance!"

Chen Shu coughed, having nearly let it slip.

"Just handle the draw yourself. I won't make it."

"Fine."

"Oh, also — remember to sacrifice some of the other contestants' lifespans. Let's be generous this time. Go for thirty years!"

"......"

Xu Xiaoyu fell into silence. So you genuinely don't see the other competitors as human beings?

......

For days on end, Chen Shu kept observing, constantly searching for an opening.

As for the Winged Caterpillar, it had been carrying out the tasks Chen Shu assigned it without pause.

Another Sunday arrived, and Xu Xiaoyu called again.

"Chen Pi, where are you?! I haven't seen you during the day lately. Our match is this morning!"

"Who's the opponent?"

"Nancang Fourth High's team! Only one S-rank contract spirit."

"Then no problem. Tell the organizers to wait — I'm gonna go torch a building!"

"Torch a what building?! Hello... hello..."

Click... click... click...

Xu Xiaoyu and Xia Bing exchanged glances, a vague sense of unease settling in their hearts.

The guy wasn't about to cause trouble again, was he?

Before they'd left, Shen Wushuang had specifically tasked the two of them with keeping an eye on Chen Shu.

Now, as it turned out, they couldn't even see the guy.

"Relax. As this tournament's star attraction, the organizers will definitely accommodate us."

Chen Shu was the guarantee of ticket sales. The vast majority of the audience came specifically for the Slime. Besides, the competition rules did allow for temporary delays.

He'd arrived at the café bright and early, his eyes fixed on the office building's entrance.

In his hand was a stack of photos. The first showed a man working at a computer.

The remaining photos were shots of the computer screen, which displayed an assignment from the organization: assassinate a genius student from Modu University.

The photos, of course, hadn't been secretly taken by him — they were the work of Xie Sunan's Winged Caterpillar!

With these photos, he could at least prove the man belonged to a criminal organization.

Torching a criminal organization's base — that was perfectly reasonable, right?

Just then, Chen Shu's eyes caught movement.

The man in the photo was walking out of the building, a briefcase slung over his shoulder, a black mask covering his face, heading toward the street outside.

"Man, I'm exhausted. Pulled another all-nighter."

Lu Pingfan let out a yawn, but the thought of the mission he'd completed the night before got his blood pumping.

A fifty-million bounty — his cut had to be at least half a million, right...

Suddenly, he glanced down and spotted a wallet on the ground.

"Huh? Finding money first thing in the morning?"

Lu Pingfan grinned and picked up the wallet. Looked like luck was on his side.

Just then, a voice called out.

"Bro, I lost my wallet! Hey, did you just pick it up?"

Chen Shu walked over casually, hands clasped behind his back.

Lu Pingfan cursed under his breath. What rotten luck — the owner found it the moment he picked it up.

Reluctantly, he said, "How do you prove it's yours?"

"My ID's inside. Take a look for yourself."

Lu Pingfan lowered his head and opened the wallet. But there was nothing inside — just a single slip of paper.

Puzzled, he pulled the note out. Written across it in large characters were the words:

"Hey. You dropped your urea bag."

"???"

Before Lu Pingfan could register anything, everything went dark. Almost reflexively, he shouted:

"Holy crap — who turned out the lights?!"

WHAM!

Chen Shu's fist connected, knocking him out cold in a single blow. His technique was as swift and clean as ever.

It had been quite a while since he'd last thrown hands — but his heroic bearing hadn't faded one bit!

Lu Pingfan was just an ordinary person, after all. How could he possibly withstand the God Punch?

"R... robbery!"

At that moment, a man on the street caught sight of the scene before him.

Holy hell — a broad-daylight robbery first thing in the morning?! Wasn't this the center of Nancang City?!

Was there no law and order left in this world?!

Chen Shu turned his head slightly, a vicious glare shooting from his eyes, a wicked grin curling at the corner of his mouth.

The textbook image of a major villain!

"Big bro, I was wrong, I didn't see anything!"

With that, the man bolted.

Chen Shu clicked his tongue. He hadn't expected the guy to be scared off by how devastatingly handsome he was.

He dragged Lu Pingfan into a nearby public restroom.

In under ten minutes, one of the stalls had gained an unconscious man in nothing but his underwear.

Chen Shu held a USB drive in his hand, a grin on his face. Another piece of evidence.

That took care of everything, didn't it?

Even if the Dragon Guard caught him, he could prove the target was a criminal organization.

Ten minutes later, Chen Shu emerged from the public restroom — dressed in a full suit, briefcase in hand, the very image of a corporate elite.

"Here I come. Dark Night Organization!"

Chen Shu muttered under his breath and headed straight for the office tower.

He had evidence now, but he wanted to see the inside of the organization for himself. Who knew — maybe he'd find an opportunity to pocket some cash while he was at it.

If things really went south, the worst-case scenario was lighting the place up and running...

But just as he reached the entrance, a security guard's voice stopped him in his tracks.

"Halt!"

[1] 尿素袋子 (Urea Bag): This chapter title is a homage to one of the foundational storytelling formats of Chinese internet culture. On Baidu Tieba forums circa 2008–2012, the "你的XX掉了" ("Hey, you dropped your X!") format became iconic: a narrator establishes a mundane street scene, shouts an absurd distraction object at the target, then attacks while the target is confused. The urea/fertilizer bag is a perfectly absurd choice — a large, dirty agricultural sack entirely incongruous with an urban setting. Within this novel, the urea bag has been Chen Shu's signature weapon since Chapter 70 — a sack he uses to hood opponents' heads before punching them. The meta joke here: Chen Shu doesn't even use the physical bag. He puts a NOTE referencing the bag inside a wallet, and the note itself IS the distraction. The target reads it, his brain short-circuits trying to process why there's a note about a urea bag in a lost wallet, and he gets KO'd before he can recover. The concept of the bag is just as effective as the bag itself.

[2] 判头 (Pàn Tou — "Sentencing"): A pun combining 判头 (conviction/sentencing result) with 盼头 (pàn tou — something to look forward to). Chen Shu is saying he shouldn't be in such a hurry to get convicted — but 判头 echoes 盼头's connotation of "anticipating something," as if prison were a life milestone to look forward to.