I'm Just a Cat! (P.S. My Stand is a Menace)

Chapter 343 - 44: Reality Is Just a Game (Bonus - for 300 Power Stones)

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Chapter 343: Chapter 44: Reality Is Just a Game (Bonus Chapter for 300 Power Stones)

"Onii-chan, stop! You only just barely got out of there!"

Kirito’s little sister—or rather, his cousin—was desperately wrestling away the helmet he was about to put back on his head.

Though "desperately" wasn’t quite the word for it.

Having only just escaped SAO, he hadn’t yet regained the nutrition he’d lost; even the muscles that kept his body functioning had withered considerably, and he’d start panting after just a few extra steps. How could someone like that ever out-wrestle a sister who’d been practicing kendo all along?

When he saw his sister hoist the helmet high overhead, Kirito’s panic spilled out completely. "Suguha, don’t break it! I just want to check its operating program!"

When he’d gone to visit Asuna, she still hadn’t woken; she might still be trapped inside SAO, and the NerveGear might have local save data... These were all things the outside experts had failed to crack, which was exactly why he needed to keep hunting down Kayaba Akihiko to have it out with him.

And it wasn’t just Asuna—there were Yimi and Yui, too...

"Honestly, the way you just moved, you were about to put it right back on, weren’t you? I have no idea what this is all about, but either way, I’m confiscating this helmet for now."

Suguha looked at Kirito, and saw him hang his head without a word, eyes vacant and unfocused, lost in a daze.

What on earth had happened over the past year and more?

Still, out of worry, Suguha turned and walked out clutching the NerveGear, leaving a parting shot before she left. "If you dare come sneak it back, I’ll tell Mom you snuck into my room to do who-knows-what."

"..."

Suguha was, technically, his cousin. The year he turned eight, the two of them had been sent together to their grandfather’s kendo dojo to train, though he’d given it up within two years and earned himself a thorough, physical lesson from their grandfather for it.

Back then Suguha had begged for him in tears—"I’ll work hard enough for Onii-chan’s share too, so please stop hitting him"—and it was from around that time, coupled with his discovery that he and Suguha were actually cousins, that he’d grown far more distant from her.

Suguha probably really hated how he was so obsessed with games—still fixated on this stuff even after finally getting out, and the like.

Kirito sighed and, barely holding his own body upright, headed out the door.

"Onii-chan, what are you up to now?" Hearing the commotion, Suguha poked her head out, watching him warily.

"Going to visit Asuna."

"Then let me help you walk."

...

"She’s already been discharged? So she’s woken up, right?"

Having learned of Asuna’s condition from the nurse, Kirito let out a small breath of relief.

It seemed she’d simply woken a little later than the others—because of her constitution, perhaps?

This was a hassle—it seemed he’d forgotten to exchange contact info back in the game; after all, everything had happened far too suddenly. Still, it wasn’t as though he’d never be able to find her.

"Kirito!"

A familiar voice sounded at his side.

Though her clothes were different and her figure far thinner than in the game—by no small margin—he recognized her at a single glance.

"Asuna?"

The nurse had said Asuna was discharged some time ago, so why was she here? Was it because she’d known he would definitely come to visit?

Kirito turned his gaze over and saw Asuna, holding a little girl by each hand, coming toward him in small steps—happy yet hesitant, and slightly out of breath.

Even with the special care that lavish sums of money had bought, Asuna, who hadn’t moved about in so long, could barely handle an exertion comparable to a shopping trip.

The two familiar little girls were each licking an ice cream cone, and Yui was even glancing around curiously, left and right.

"...Am I even awake?"

Was she truly lucid?

"Is that... Kirito? How strange."

The closer she drew, the slower Asuna’s steps became.

Just as her murmured doubts suggested, she couldn’t be at all certain whether the Kirito before her was real, or merely a fabricated, false NPC—just as she couldn’t even tell whether this world was a game or a direct manipulation of her memories.

Her mother had acted far too realistically. Though her mom hadn’t actually launched an attack, even after Asuna had taken a broom and given her two not-especially-hard whacks, the woman still kept trying to block her way, and seemed to have triggered some kind of seeing-red rage buff.

In reality, a mother like that would have cowed Asuna into not daring to make a sound—but in a game, she’d even dared to grab her mother and shove her aside.

That said, her strength was so feeble she couldn’t even overpower her mother—entirely consistent with the state of someone who’d been bedridden for over a year—which made her doubt for a few seconds whether this world was real. But the ironclad proof, Yimi and Yui, had been standing off to the side dumbstruck the whole time, which counted as evidence for the belief Asuna held so firmly.

In short, she’d seized the chance and bolted.

"Onii-chan?"

Kirito gently freed himself from Suguha’s supporting hand and, leaning on a cane, stepped slowly toward Asuna. Both women, who cared for him so deeply, clearly noticed that a trembling had come over him—one that had nothing to do with physical discomfort.

"Asuna..."

"Yimi, Yui..."

He threw the cane aside and crouched down to embrace the two little girls—an act that drained every last bit of strength from his body, even leaving him momentarily dizzy.

He couldn’t understand it, but it set his heart at ease. In this moment he had no desire whatsoever to judge whether it was real or fake; his different circumstances, and the fact that he hadn’t witnessed it with his own eyes, kept him from leaping to the same associations Asuna had.

"I beat the backstage shit-cooker for you." Yimi angled for credit, hoping to trade it for more tasty things to eat.

Yui, meanwhile, gnawed on her ice-cold ice cream while reaching out to poke and pinch at Kirito here and there.

She was thoroughly confused by now. This was the real world, wasn’t it? On the way over she’d even taken a tumble and scraped her knee open—it had bled and hurt so, so much—but then Yimi had wiped a hand over the wound and it had simply vanished.

Was this a power that worked in reality too? Then did Yui still count as a program now? Even the feel of Papa under her hands seemed more real than before.

His sobbing went on for a full three minutes, and no one came to interrupt him—after all, what could be less out of place than someone weeping sorrowfully in a hospital? It was also the first time Suguha had ever seen her brother wear such an expression.

It was a long while before Kirito emerged from his emotions. "Yimi and Yui—why are they here in the real world?"

"Right—that’s exactly the problem." Kirito’s reaction and his tears were just enough to let the deeply uneasy Asuna set her heart at ease, if only a little.

Asuna gently took his hand, her mood heavy. "Kirito, we... or maybe just I—it seems I never left the game world at all."

"Never left?" Kirito blanked for a moment, then rose again with Suguha’s support.

The instant he’d seen Yimi and Yui, his first reaction had been that these two children were actually real people in reality—who had logged in and played the roles of a boss and an NPC directly, the way Kayaba Akihiko had.

There were an awful lot of holes in it, but as explanations went, it was a very reasonable one.

Not noticing Yimi’s cat ears, Kirito gave a helpless smile. "Asuna, if this were the game world, then was the way you were panting when you ran over just now fake too? From what I understand of programming, there’s no way the outside world could have advanced so fast in under two years."

"Kirito, are you real?" Asuna hesitantly released his hand.

"Mm, of course I’m real—though in the real world I’m called Kirigaya Kazuto." Kirito answered gravely, having realized there was something wrong with Asuna’s mental state.

Asuna exhaled and looked down at the little cat. "Yimi, show him that thing."

"Okay." Yimi took her personal cooking pot out of her inventory, then put it back.

Kirito: "?"

Suguha: "!"

"Do you see now, Kirito?" If you still don’t get it, then you’re fake too.

"Wait, what on earth is going on? I’m definitely a real person, I’m sure of it!" Suguha babbled incoherently, touching her own face.

Unfortunately, Suguha—whom Kirito took to be someone who disliked getting absorbed in games—had actually secretly fallen for FullDive gaming herself; specifically, that ALO overseen by Sugou Nobuyuki.

Yui tugged at the hem of Asuna’s clothes. "Mama, I don’t really understand it either, but this really is reality—I can’t detect any program at all."

Yui was fake too?

"I get it now..." Kirito, who had been trying to bring up a debug menu, gave a helpless little laugh.

His whole conception of the world had, naturally, collapsed—though what he felt more of was probably relief.

...

Everyone was surely convinced they were real people—just like certain high-level AI NPCs Asuna had encountered on the earlier floors of SAO, who never once doubted whether they truly lived in that world.

In this moment, putting together everything Kirito had said, Asuna finally arrived at a small measure of understanding.

No game this realistic had yet been developed in "reality"—so could it be that they truly had returned to reality, but their reality was itself, in fact, an even more advanced game?!

Oh no—they’d been NPCs all along!

Perhaps real "humans" didn’t even have a setting for bleeding, the way SAO only had light-and-shadow effects.

No—the truly bad part wasn’t just that. Whether or not this world belonged to some game, they were, in the end, living here. Since this was their reality, then even after her worldview had crumbled, Asuna still had to face the problems of that reality.

Back home, Asuna gently pushed the door open a crack and poked half her head inside.

She saw her mother holding the very broom that had smacked her twice earlier, face slightly contorted, waiting for something.

Asuna backed right out again and carefully shut the door.

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