Chapter 428 - 372: Mai Mingle: She Does Not Accept

Chapter 428: Chapter 372: Mai Mingle: She Does Not Accept

"Miss Mai," the male caregiver asked, "are you tired from walking? Why don’t you sit down? You’ve been on your feet for a while now."

As he spoke, he gestured to the empty wheelchair he was pushing.

For some reason, Mai Mingle found the wheelchair exceptionally jarring today. Just looking at it felt like a stone had settled in her stomach.

It felt like only yesterday she could run, jump, and eat to her heart’s content. Now, after walking for just ten minutes, her legs felt weak and shaky. She’d exhale, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t draw in the next breath.

’This isn’t how it should be.’

’Wasn’t I just a young woman a moment ago?’

She hadn’t had the chance to run freely yet, to run until she was out of breath, to run until she collapsed on the ground, lying among the grass and fallen leaves to watch the sky change with the seasons.

"Where’s Yi Lian?"

She refused to sit, as if sitting down would be an admission of something she couldn’t accept. Perhaps it was a case of guilt by association; looking at the male caregiver also made her skin crawl. "Where did she go?" she asked.

At seventy-six, she had finally started accepting care from a home health aide. The aide didn’t come often, as she was still mostly able to care for herself.

The young woman named Yi Lian seemed particularly fond of Mai Mingle. The moment she walked in the door, she’d start chattering away. While she worked, she would pour out all the big and small events of the past week, lining them up to be told within her limited one-hour visit. Sometimes she’d try to talk about several things at once, and the stories would trip over each other, vying for her voice.

Through her cheerful chatter, Mai Mingle learned that Trader Joe’s had new, convenient, and tasty frozen foods; that her sister’s child had broken their ankle; that her boss was incredibly demanding; and that she could never find a suitable boyfriend...

During that one hour, Mai Mingle always felt as if she were twenty-six herself.

She would give Yi Lian advice and knitted her a handbag for her birthday. Yi Lian would even stop by sometimes after work, and the two would watch movies together...

But starting in October, Yi Lian had suddenly stopped coming, for reasons unknown.

When Mai Mingle called her, Yi Lian had soothed her, saying she had some things to deal with and had taken time off. She told Mai Mingle to wait for her to come back. That wait had now stretched to nearly two months. She tried calling again once or twice, but no one answered.

Sometimes, Mai Mingle would even dream of Yi Lian opening the door to her apartment.

"She said she only took two weeks off," Mai Mingle said, still refusing to sit in the wheelchair. She stood by the roadside, her legs trembling. "...But it’s been two months."

It was December 2016, the final month of a year that, like her own life, was drawing to a close.

"Caregivers come and go. It’s common for them not to stay long. But I’ll take good care of you," the male caregiver said. "Besides, I heard she got married last month."

Mai Mingle froze. ’Why didn’t Yi Lian say anything?’

She had clearly said she couldn’t find the right person and that she would bring any man she met in the future for Mai Mingle to see, because she trusted Mai Mingle’s judgment... How could she suddenly get married without a word?

"Ah, that was just her being polite." The caregiver chuckled and patted the wheelchair again. "We look after so many elderly people. They’re not our own grandparents. How could we possibly notify every single one if something comes up? Please, sit down, Miss Mai. It’ll be bad if you fall."

Mai Mingle truly couldn’t stand much longer.

She held onto the wheelchair and slowly sat down, feeling her porous, weary bones and muscles go slack, as if instantly released from a great pressure.

’I was just a young woman a moment ago. Even the last time I was seventy-six, it wasn’t this bad—’

’Huh?’

’The last time I was seventy-six?’

The thought was as absurd as it was intensely real.

She was almost certain she had lived through being seventy-six once before. It was as if she’d forgotten something very important... What was it?

The male caregiver pushed her slowly down the path. As long as Mai Mingle didn’t turn around, she couldn’t see his face.

She glanced back at him, but by the time she turned to face forward again, she had already forgotten what he looked like.

...This couldn’t be explained away as just old age and a bad memory.

’Who was this person again? When did he become my caregiver?’

"By the way, do you remember Yi Lian?" the male caregiver asked.

’What is he talking about? Weren’t we just discussing her?’

"She quit after getting married and moved back to her hometown. But last month, she came back to Blackmoor City for something and made a special trip to visit. She never mentioned you, though. It’s understandable. She was looking after quite a few seniors back then, so how could she remember every single one?"

Mai Mingle felt as if she had choked on her own breath. It took her several seconds before she could painfully swallow.

’No—that’s not right.’

Just half a minute ago, he had told her he’d heard Yi Lian just got married. Half a minute. It had only been half a minute, so why was he talking as if half a year had passed?

Mai Mingle gripped the armrests tightly. With the flesh gone from her hands, blue veins and bony knuckles protruded from beneath her thin, withered skin, which had become almost translucent.

’Wasn’t it December a moment ago?’

’Why are the trees on the street crowned with such large, dense foliage? Why are the bricks baking and steaming in the heat?’

In the sudden, bright summer day, the streets were empty. There was only the wheelchair beneath her and the person behind it, pushing her forward step by step. The wheels rolled over the pavement with a rhythmic click, and after listening for a while under the baking sun, it was almost enough to make one drowsy.

Mai Mingle pinched herself hard.

’No, I can’t just drift along with his timeline... I have a feeling that everything happening right now has happened once before. I have to remember... ’

"Wow, she looks so tired, so haggard," the male caregiver said. "No one ever expected her child to be... a special needs child with extremely high demands. Can’t even speak in full sentences. Already five or six years old, but whenever he wants something, he just screams shrilly. The way Yi Lian looks, it seems like she could collapse or fall into a coma at any moment."

Mai Mingle closed her eyes as something hot streamed down her face.

’That was her friend, her child, her Yi Lian... How could she have fallen into such a state in such a short time?’

’Right, right, I can’t forget. The time frame is too short. It doesn’t make sense.’

She kept reminding herself that only a few minutes had passed in total.

For some reason, the male caregiver seemed to be trying to convince her that years had actually passed by narrating events that spanned years. Since turning eighty, she had lacked even the strength to lift her hands to cover her ears. So, she just replayed the past over and over in her mind, ignoring his words, letting his narration slide off her shoulders.

The last time she was seventy-six, she hadn’t reached the point of needing someone to push her in a wheelchair just to get around.

In a world where all life was destined for a swift and final end, where all meaning would dissipate into nothingness, she had once encountered a miracle... a miracle she had now forgotten...

Mai Mingle refused to accept it.

She wouldn’t accept being seventy-six. She wouldn’t accept the wheelchair beneath her. She wouldn’t accept the caregiver pushing it, and she wouldn’t accept Yi Lian’s half-lived life compressed into a few minutes.

She wouldn’t accept this merciless world.

She wanted to use all her strength to pity and cherish every Yi Lian, every Lan Zhui, Chaisi, Emily, and Fu Tailan in the world, on heaven’s behalf...

(’Who are these people?’)

...every bird that streaked across the sky, every child who journeyed far from home, every lost and troubled girl...

Mai Mingle even knew where she was supposed to get the strength to do it. She just couldn’t quite remember at the moment.

"...That’s strange."

The male caregiver’s voice murmured right next to Mai Mingle’s cheek and ear. "What are you doing?"

She snapped back to her senses with a jolt.

In that instant, as if waking from a nightmare, her mind became completely clear. Memories flooded back in, returning her to the year 2026, to being twenty-eight and eighty-six—but her body remained trapped in its decrepit seventy-six-year-old state, too weak and feeble to move.

"What did you do? What’s going on? Why hasn’t any time been consumed?"

...That was Ivan’s voice.

She wasn’t sitting in a wheelchair, because there was no wheelchair.

Mai Mingle was slumped against the coffee shop’s door, like a doll with its supports removed. Ivan was squatting beside her, his two round, yellow eyes staring unblinkingly for a long moment.

"Last time, you still remembered reality, and it was enough to consume your Illusion’s time. How is it that this time, when I made you forget reality, the Illusion’s time isn’t moving at all?"

Ivan was much more articulate now. He squatted on the ground, his knees pulled up high against his shoulders, looking like the product of a human and an insect.

Mai Mingle managed to lower her eyelids slightly—her bag, the one with the gun in it, was now in Ivan’s hands.

"Can’t let you get your hands on the gun, oh no," Ivan said, seemingly noticing her gaze. "I’m a living being. If I got shot by you, even if I didn’t die, being all mushy would be a lot of trouble, wouldn’t it?"

’Is that why you ran away?’

Mai Mingle wanted to ask, but she didn’t have the strength to open her mouth.

"Now what should I do?"

Ivan seemed to be trying to make a worried expression but creased the wrong part of his face. Instead of his brows furrowing, his mouth puckered tightly toward the center, shrinking into a wrinkled fold of skin.

Mai Mingle forced her lips apart. Air escaped between her lips and teeth, forming broken, shapeless syllables.

She remembered that Lan Zhui had also struggled to speak like this during their final days.

"What?" As expected, Ivan’s attention was drawn to her.

"Why did you..." Every word Mai Mingle spoke trembled. "come back..."

"I can’t hear you," Ivan said, his expression blank. "But I’m not going to let you recover your strength just so I can hear what you have to say. You humans are so cunning."

"Why... exactly..."

Ivan couldn’t help but lean in a little closer, as if trying to read her lips to understand what she was saying. His learning speed seemed terrifyingly fast; just two days ago, he was still practicing how to chew and speak.

"Why... come back?" Mai Mingle finally asked. "What did you... need to finish..."

"Oh, so that’s what you want to know." Ivan straightened up again, his two legs still bent and planted beside him. "How could I possibly—"

Before he could finish his sentence, the figure behind him swung a baseball bat down hard, smashing it against his temple.