Chapter 23: The Gaslighting

Lumi had wanted to leave.

But now that she was standing in the hospital with Felix’s words still lingering in her mind, that courage seemed to have disappeared somewhere along the way.

’Then, go kill yourself.’

Her fingers trembled slightly against the fabric of her dress.

For years, they had reminded her that she couldn’t survive without the Pei family. Whenever she complained about something, they would tell her to remember who provided her food and a roof over her head. Whenever she wanted something for herself, they would remind her that she had nothing to offer in return. Even when she was old enough to understand that their words were cruel, hearing them repeatedly had slowly made her believe that perhaps they were right.

Without the Pei family, where would she go?

What could she do when she had no Guiding ability, no money of her own, and no one she could truly rely on?

She had been angry when she said she wanted to leave, but now that the anger had faded, the fear they had planted in her for so many years was beginning to creep back in.

Lumi lowered her gaze toward the hospital floor.

She still wanted to leave. She just didn’t know whether she was brave enough to face whatever came after it.

Celestine was already awake, though she still looked weak from what had happened earlier. Her face was pale, and there were faint marks around her neck, but the moment she noticed Lumi standing beside her bed, the little concern in her expression was quickly replaced by annoyance.

"Do you feel satisfied now?" Celestine asked, her voice weak but sharp. "After I almost choked to death?"

Lumi stared at her, unable to respond.

Her mother, Esther, was already gritting her teeth in anger, though she seemed to be holding herself back for Celestine’s sake. She stepped closer to Lumi, her eyes filled with accusation.

"I asked for your help," Esther said through clenched teeth. "I told you to help your sister, but what did you do?"

Lumi’s fingers curled slightly.

"You just stood there and did nothing, letting your own sister almost die!" Esther’s voice rose as her frustration finally flared.

’What can I do? Do I even have the Guiding energy to help her at that time?’

The words remained trapped inside Lumi’s head. How could she possibly say them out loud when they would never listen to her anyway?

They had already decided what she was.

A burden, a mistake and someone who had brought nothing but misfortune to the Pei family.

"I knew the elders were right..." Esther muttered, her eyes filled with hatred. "When they said you would bring us bad luck, I should have listened to them from the beginning."

Lumi remained silent. Those words no longer surprised her. After so many years, she had become almost numb to them.

"I apologise for not being able to help at that time." She paused, clasping her fingers together. "I was simply afraid—"

"Afraid?" Esther immediately cut her off, her voice sharp with disbelief.

"Afraid of what?" she demanded. "You were watching your own sister being strangled, and you were afraid?"

Lumi lowered her head. "I..."

"What kind of sister are you?" Esther’s voice trembled with anger. "Even if you couldn’t Guide him, you could have done something! You could have tried to pull him away, called for help, anything!"

Lumi’s lips parted, but she couldn’t bring herself to explain.

Even Esther, who had once been an A-rank Guide, alongside with other top rank Guides had remained frozen in front of Evan’s Rampage, unable to approach him or do anything to stop him. She had seen the same terrifying power as everyone else, yet somehow Lumi, who was merely a citizen with no detectable Guiding energy, wasn’t even allowed to admit that she had been afraid.

She lowered her eyes, swallowing the words that had gathered in her throat.

’I was afraid too.’

In the end, Lumi could only lower her head.

"I’m sorry..."

Celestine suddenly pushed herself upright and reached for the jug of water beside her bed. Before Lumi could react, the water was splashed straight toward her, soaking the front of her dress.

"You are not sincere at all!" Celestine snapped. "Get lost!"

The jug slipped from her hand and shattered against the floor.

Lumi flinched violently, her body instinctively shrinking back as she stared at the broken pieces scattered across the floor. For a brief moment, she was afraid another object would be thrown at her.

She bit her lower lip and remained where she stood, her mind becoming more and more confused.

’What am I supposed to do?’

They had asked her to apologise, so she apologised. But apparently, even that wasn’t enough.

Now it was about whether she was sincere.

Lumi lowered her gaze toward her soaked dress, trying to understand where she had gone wrong this time. She had admitted that she was sorry, even though she still didn’t understand what she was supposed to apologise for.

Whatever she did, it seemed there was always something wrong with it.

If she stayed silent, they said she was cold and heartless.

If she tried to explain herself, they said she was making excuses.

If she apologised, they said she wasn’t sincere.

Lumi’s fingers slowly curled against the wet fabric. Maybe there really was nothing she could do that would ever satisfy them.

"What made my Fated Guide suddenly go into rampage?"

The unfamiliar voice immediately drew every pair of eyes toward the door.

A man was leaning casually against the doorway, looking as though he had simply walked into the wrong room by accident. Lumi didn’t recognize him at all, yet the moment she turned back toward Celestine, she noticed something strange.

Celestine’s already pale face had become even paler, and her lips were trembling.

Lumi’s eyes narrowed slightly.

Why did she look so frightened?

The man finally straightened himself and slowly walked into the room.

With every step he took closer, the atmosphere seemed to change. Felix’s anger disappeared from his face, while Esther’s expression also tightened with unease. The two people who had been shouting at Lumi moments ago suddenly looked as though they were afraid to even breathe too loudly.

Lumi looked between them, confused.

’Who is this person?’

The man stopped a few steps away and glanced around the room with a lazy expression before his gaze settled on Lumi.

"So..." He lifted a hand and casually pointed at her, "I believe this is Lumi. Evan’s Fated Guide."

Lumi’s heart skipped.

His finger shifted toward Celestine. The lazy look in his eyes remained unchanged as he added, "And you..." His finger finally stopped on Celestine.

"My Fated Guide?"