Day One Thousand One Hundred And Twenty-Eight

Dear Diary,

Y'know, I've heard all the old sayings about 'necessity is the mother of invention' and 'desperation breeds ingenuity', not to mention the whole 'we can because we must', but I never really put a whole lot of weight behind those old sayings. I'm still not sure how accurate they are in general, but I think there are definitely some things the folks here and now do that are way better than the ones back in the day, and I can't think of any reason they'd come up with them other than the general quality of life here being so much shittier.

Wait, no, maybe I can. Yeah, the Deities hereabouts, especially the ones involved with the local Pact Loki told me about way back in the day, stifled any kind of Change they could stifle. Zeus killed Hephaestus in his crib, Aristotle wasn't a thing, and I'm pretty sure that did for Alexander as well, and I've recently discovered that the Muses aren't real here either. Which is weird, because I'm sure I've heard people use that word, but then again Blend might have translated something like 'person who inspires me' to 'muse', for all I know.

My point though, and I promise I have one, and if I try hard enough maybe I'll get to it before I'm distracted by my own brain, is that not every Change is a good one. I'm pretty sure the pirates back in the day during the Golden Age of Piracy had shit like Articles of Agreement now that I think about it. One of my history teachers told us about that, I think, or maybe I read it online somewhere. My pre-Isekai memory was far from perfect before I indulged in so much THC. But with that understanding, watching all the older shows the Aunties had on tape, not to mention those tapes giving me a penchant for watching old shit online, that gave me some insight into what life was like fifty or sixty years before I was born.

It seemed kinda like a fantasy land, really, but when I looked it up, I realized that no, the folks doing exploitation had just innovated the shit out of how to exploit people in the years between Leave It To Beaver and Stranger Things. Shit, at one point I binged The Simpsons, and got kinda bent out of shape that they were tryna sell Homer as 'working poor', because he had one job and bought a house. So I looked up the details on when the show started, and how much somebody doing the shittiest job at a nuclear plant made back then, how much a house cost back then, and got really, really pissed off. Then got really, really high, because it wasn't like I could do jack or shit about it.

At any rate, Change means innovation, but I gotta remember that the assholes of the world can innovate too. I also gotta remember that the folks around the margins, the ones the Deities and Dukes wind up ignoring except when they need warm bodies to die for the cause, are gonna wind up with the biggest reasons to innovate, and the least reason to follow the rules.

Which is how they came up with the idea of hammering out so many details on contracts rather than leaving them for courts to decide, I guess.

When we got home from the family therapy session at Dad's place, I asked Saffron about it as we were soaking in the Bath. Well, about something related. "Kitten?"

"Yes, Goof?"

"Does the Grand Council do that with laws for the Alliance?"

She head tilted, then chuckled. "Can I assume from your question that should Conrad need my measurements, he need only ask you?"

"Nah." She raised an eyebrow, and I laughed as I added, "I mean, your ass? Your tits? Sure. But I've got no fuckin' clue about your shoe size."

She just smiled serenely. "You do have your favorites." Before I could respond to that, she shook her head and said, "as is just and right and proper, not to mention completely normal and nothing any one of us is upset about."

I realized just then that she'd been talking about more than just body parts. "I shouldn't though."

"Why not?" She rolled over on top of me, folding her arms across me and resting her chin on her wrists. "You are, as you like to say, Human Adjacent."

I might have pouted as I said, "higher standards. Great power and great responsibility and all that good shit."

She slow blinked. "At what point did having a favorite become linked to irresponsibility in your Goof brain?"

I shrugged. "Means I'm not gonna be fair."

"Only if you ignore your bias and let it control you."

I sighed. "You realize that's kinda impossible. To really know how biased I am?"

"So you do the best you can, and listen when we tell you you've done well, or need to adjust."

I smiled at that. "Yeah. Yeah, I guess that's part of why I ordained you guys, isn't it?"

She fake pouted. "I thought that's why you married us?"

"I mean, I haven't married Tallulah or Siobhan."

Both of them looked over, and Tallulah quietly thought, yet.

At which point Siobhan added, not that I'm eager to take on that extra responsibility. I am fully content being a Concubine and Mother.

I chewed air and made annoyed Tabitha noises until Saffron pulled herself up my front to kiss me. Interesting sensation when she pushed me under, lips never leaving mine. I mean, I know my lungs are mostly for show, and with the Boon of no breathing she doesn't much care about that either, but it was weird to have Bath water flooding into our noses and not, y'know, be at all worried about it. Probably mostly because with everybody washing before they got in, the water stayed clean.

Not to mention the Wards in the filtration system.

Huh, really?

She nodded, never breaking liplock. Indeed, love. I've improved them since Jack and Karen.

Cool.

And warm.

I smiled into the kiss at that. No, you.

We stayed like that, Co-Locating to tuck the kids into bed, then collapsing back to the Bath. Not worried about Maze?

Saffron pushed herself upright, shoving me to the floor of the Bath, until her head broke water just enough to announce, "if Mazikeen or any of our other children are still in the room, your Mama and I are about to do some things you ought not see. None of you are so small that you don't understand 'go to bed now', so... Go to bed now."

There. Due diligence done. Time to do Tabitha.

Buh...

She wrinkled her nose. Please, Tabitha. I saw my parents doing such things once as a child. It's how most children in poorer families in the Yards learn of such things. And I did tell them to go to bed.

Not worried about the forbidden fruit thing?

She shrugged. If they're old enough to be tempted, they're old enough to learn consequences of ignoring us. The very next moment I had an itty bitty Great Kraken in my arms.

Oh. You wanted kinky kinky. Got it.

Yeah, my Wife knows how to distract me. Also, she might be better with tentacles than I am. Not sure. Further testing required.

Of course, that at least gave me plenty of things to ponder as I tried to keep everything the negotiators were talking about straight today. Seriously, I'm pretty sure the reconciliation is gonna take four days, because each and every possible combination of line items is being reviewed.

Y'know, I might wind up going a little nuts from this, but I realize how important it is now. I also don't think any part of me will feel guilt about this, unlike, y'know, killing people.