Day Nine Hundred And Seventy-One

Dear Diary,

Sometimes I can't tell if I'm being too hard on myself, or not strict enough. Take this past week or so tracking down and eliminating the Spartans. Like, end to end, the whole deal.

Starting off, it took me way too fuckin' long to get off my ass and start tracking them down. Yeah, I know, I started the Season dealing with a whole assed existential crisis, in the literal 'what even am I, do I even exist' sense. I'm honestly not sure if I would have been even vaguely useful for the tracking end of things like that. I sure as shit wouldn't have had the bright idea of granting useful Boons to my tracking squad, which frankly is the only reason we caught up to them. Fuck, I might not even have had the whole squad with me, I might have just had Marie and the hunters, or maybe the Heroes. Fuck, I might have just gone looking myself, in which case I'd still be out in the sticks near Boltophsberg fucking around in the snow.

Thing is, I wouldn't have caught the Spartans by forcing myself out into the snow. I'd have spent a bunch of time doing nothing useful. So griefing myself over not jumping on the Spartan situation isn't helping anybody, and sure as shit wouldn't be helping myself.

Once I got my ass in gear and gathered the best trackers I knew, we pretty much brute forced that shit. Thing is, that's kinda my jam. Yeah, I'm sure there are ways we might have finessed things. Maps, fancy math, geometry, doing shit in M-Space to detect trace amounts of Cold Iron, I dunno, all kinds of wacky shit I'd have to get Saffron, Tallulah, or Siobhan to do most of the work for me. Okay, Saffron or Tallulah, not because they're any more Skilled or smarter, but because Darling Ice Pop is still not in the best shape. Okay, that's not true. I kinda like the shape she's in. Makes me wanna do things to her. With her. But she's not in any condition to be doing high level mathemagics and experimental Shaping.

So yeah, we brute forced that shit, but here's the thing; Saffron let me know that the Alliance was already doing all the fancy shit to look for the Spartans. Scrying, scouting, all the ways I'd normally try to find somebody like that, the Alliance military had that shit locked up. I think the only reason she hadn't just flooded the zone with troops was... Okay, couple reasons I can think of off the top of my head, and both of them are valid. In the first place, it takes me concerted effort to kill one of those Spartan fucks. Yeah, Marie can do it, but again, Marie is dangerous on a level most people can't comprehend. Take a Princess of Sparta, turn her into a custom crafted murderfuck machine, then give her four millennia of experience doing unto others, and you have Marie Aetos-Diaz, Queen of the Murderfuck Cult and, by the grace of my dubious rizz and Saffron's planning Skills, my Wife.

Anybody less than that is likely to wind up a casualty before they can report in.

The other, less licking my own clit thing is that the Alliance is fuckin' big, and way less populated than my old world. Seriously, I think Kitten's got like four thousand Heroes working for her, and I'm also pretty sure she's keeping less than one Unit of Troops active per Hero. Yeah, Troops are good for standing watch and holding ground, but right now we're not at war with anybody. Any Troops we've got are basically either Guards or cadre. Because our Heroes are commissioned officers, and there is a need for experienced non-commissioned officers in any kind of professional military. Learned that in ROTC, and holy fuck but Saffron has implemented that shit. Yeah, our commissioned officers are a lot more effective than the dipshits with the brass back in the day, but they're still officers. They still mostly think like officers, and while that's an important thing to have, it's equally important to have qualified NCOs making sure latrines get dug and Troops get fed.

So between not having the manpower to flood the zone and flooding the zone being a recipe for useless casualties, we couldn't really brute force things that way, but having some decent trackers lead me to the fuckers was definitely a viable option. Which I took.

Yeah, look, it was a brute force option, but in a lot of ways I'm still a brute. Yeah, I excel at wrecking shit, and I can sometimes finesse the shit wrecking, but Ericson's skull is still one of my favorite kills, and I think I need to take several seats for even having a 'favorite kill'.

Also, I think I'm babbling because Worship or not, I've gone more than a week without sleep.

Once the farmers were standing, I grabbed them all and stepped them to the Infirmary. Yeah, they were dudes in the Ladies' Infirmary. They were also farmers, not soldiers, and by the time I dropped them there the two Infirmary Cadets had called in a bunch of help to deal with the injured I'd dropped off earlier. After dropping a quick Mana boosting Stabilize in any red jackets who looked winded, I collapsed back to two of me at that Farmstead.

"Everybody okay?"

In answer to my call, the trackers stood up and waved. I waved them in, and a minute later we all stood in the courtyard of the Farmstead, in amongst the dead bodies of a couple dozen Spartans. Okay, some of them were still inside; I Co-Located, grabbed them, and dragged them out to dump them in the yard.

"What will you do with the bodies?" Lemmy's question should have been innocent, but somehow my lack of sleep made it sound like an accusaion.

"Fuck. I dunno. Probably ought to burn them. Maybe in one of the fields. Shit's good fertilizer, right?"

"Strip Them." Marie made her pronouncement in the middle of turning yet another Spartan into a build-your-own Spartan kit.

I shrugged. "Is that what they'd do in Sparta?"

"It Was."

Honestly, that's more cultural sensitivity than I thought the Spartans deserved at this point, but I nodded. "Can you guys help out with that?"

"It seems disrespectful, thought?" Silk I couldn't even get mad at. He said it while dragging one of the remaining more or less intact bodies into the line Marie and I had dropped them in. Which she was working her way through, leaving every body in at least fourteen pieces. Well, fourteen plus their hearts, although she'd been squishing those into meaty shreds after ripping them out.

I shrugged. "Marie's originally from Sparta. She'd know." My Murder Mittens shot me a look, but not a real mad one. Almost like she'd begun coming to terms with her own origin. Then again, she'd proved her own superiority over this batch, which couldn't be the dregs, if Sparta sent them here to fuck with us.

"Strip Them. Burn Them." She kept working her way through the bodies, tearing them to pieces. Well, slicing them. My Murder Mittens, her claws be sharp.

By the time she had the bodies rendered into body parts, Closer and Chloros came back from one of the sheds with a big barrow. At that point I realized there was another problem I needed to deal with. Kitten?

Yes, love?

I've got two kids here, just about catatonic, and whatever the Spartans did to those bodies? I think they did them to these two kids.

A moment later Saffron dropped into the courtyard. "Show me."

I looked around, my gaze landing on Marie. "Can you take over here?"

"Yes, Vlickies." Her smile warmed something inside of me that had frozen when I saw what the Spartans had been doing.

I took Saffron's hand and stepped her inside. The two kids still stood there, more or less motionless. Not paralyzed or anything, just standing there. The only change is that their fingers were interlaced, but when I glanced at their hands they dropped to their sides.

"It's okay, kids. It's okay. The Spartans are dead. You're safe now."

Their gazes shifted to me, then to each other, then back to me. Nothing but catatonic stares other than that, though. Like whatever had been done to them had broken them so badly all they could do was stand there waiting. "Those bastards," Saffron whispered, almost like she didn't realize she was speaking out loud.

"Yeah. I dunno what they did to these two, but..."

"I do. I also have some suspicion how they kept the others from being Revived. Or Translocated."

"Go on?"

She stepped over to the pair, took their hands, and gently pulled them down to sit. "Can you bring me blankets, maybe a mattress? Oh, and some water, maybe some food."

I nodded, then Co-Located. One of me stepped to the Academy kitchens and stole some pitchers of water and a tray of eggs. Not spicy ones, because the kids had a kind of Dan look about them. Still, the Academy had started making big trays of scrambled eggs with a little salt and pepper for the Cadets who weren't into spice, and those were way easier to eat than the soft boiled ones the Academy had when I arrived.

At the same time, I stepped over to the bed, ripped the mattress off, and laid it down where Saffron could lift the kids onto it. They tensed as she did, but didn't resist. I hopped through the building gathering blankets, and with each blanket dropped on or around them, they shuddered. A few moments later I returned with the eggs and water, as well as a couple loaves of bread. I set it all in front of them. "Eat up, kids."

They just stared. I broke one of the loaves in half, took a bite, and then handed the girl the half I'd bitten. I had to press it into her hand, and she just kinda stared at it. Saffron lifted a stein to the boy's mouth. "Drink." Her voice had all kinds of weird harmonics, like she'd done some kind of Shaping, but the kid drank.

You sure that's not gonna hurt them more?

They will not heal if they starve to death. They also will not purge the Cold Iron dust they were fed without eating or drinking.

Sonofa... Fuck.

Saffron pulled me down to sit next to her, and the two of us alternated between taking little drinks and bites and feeding larger ones to the kids. I heard something outside, but Saffron just laid a hand on mine when I tensed. I sent for Karen, she and Marie are seeing to your trackers.

Thanks Kitten.

She glanced out the window. "It's getting close to dusk. You really should be going." At my confused look, she said, "to your Revel." My mouth dropped open, but I couldn't bring myself to say anything. Not sure why. It just felt like somehow despite everything I'd still failed. Saffron pulled me to her side, molded herself to me. "Really, love. Your Worshippers need you as much as you need them."

I sighed. Nodded. "Okay. Where to?"

Tallulah?

A moment after Saffron called for her, Tallulah was there, reaching down to take my hand. The two kids never moved. "Will you be okay here?"

"Some Heroes and Troops will be along to secure things shortly, and I'll see to it these two are taken care of." I frowned, and Saffron tilted her head. "Would you like me to arrange to have them brought to the Homestead? It's not far."

"Uh... Shit." I realized right then that my wife knew me better than I knew myself. "Is that okay?"

She smiled, and everything was right with the world. "Of course it is, love. I'll see to it. Now, go on. Tallulah and your congregation at Rich Man's Port are waiting." She flicked her fingers at me in a shooing motion, I nodded to Tallulah, and a moment later my long tall Sidhe lady and I stood in...

Okay, it looked surprisingly somebody had taken one of my Altars, the whole bed throne thing, and put it in one of the big stern cabins of a Tentacle. I mean, not really, because there were steps down to ascending rows of pews on three sides, but the one remaining side had that whole bank of windows, and they looked out over the river. I'm not sure how they'd gotten the angle, but I recognized the cliff my Black Dragon had splattered multiple Sidhe warships across. I also noticed a few ships out in the river, and maybe one or two that were moored at the ends of their docks.

I smirked at Tallulah. "Showing me off to the whole harbor?"

She just shrugged. "A reminder to those who need one." She sat down on my Altar, and at my quizzical look, she waved me over. She'd stripped us both as we stepped here, and I'd dropped my Blend out of habit. When she took me by the hips and gently turned me to face the congregation I smiled at the frankly ridiculous variety of faces and forms filing the pews. I mean, I get it. Rich Man's Port has the biggest Fae population in the Alliance, and I'd already been introduced to at least two different kinds of four legged Fae who clearly had enough going on upstairs to count as Worshippers, but in the crowd I saw dogs, cats, birds, horses, even a fuckin' seal. I mean, I'm pretty sure the seal was a Selkie, but that's just a guess.

I did not expect Tallulah to gently yet firmly pull me down into that super exposed position Siobhan loved from New Years. I'd been the base for plenty of my Clergy and Worshippers in that position, but that's 'cause I really did enjoy putting them front and center, showing the world how wonderful they were. Because no matter what, every member of my Clergy, every volunteer at one of my Temples, they all did shit to make the world a better place. All I did was wreck shit that got in their way.

But here, and now, when I looked over my shoulder to see Tallulah lying there in boy mode, amusing me with how clearly she was still a she even in boy mode, she nodded back to the congregation. "This, tonight, is for you, Goddess."

I...

I'm not sure what I was gonna say to her. To them. Because a moment later all of my High Clergy, Wives and Darling included, whispered into my head, please?

I'm six kinds of bitch, but I'm not the kind who would turn down a gift somebody wanted to give me that badly. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm not sure I can look them in the eyes like this?"

Tallulah caught my murmur, and her hands slipped up along my sides. "You need not, but..."

"Butt?"

"Isn't that sixth?" She murmured, her voice full of snark. Then it softened. "But your Worshippers might feel some way if you will not look upon them as they sing for you."

That snapped my gaze around to the congregation, who took that as their cue to start singing. "Agency, Egalitarianism, Redemption."

"Oh. Oh, no. Uh... Are you..." Tallulah didn't answer my half spoken questions. Instead she took me gently by the waist and slid me up, then back down. The congregation, Human and Fae alike, didn't quite hit that mocking singsong my ladies had, the one my earlier congregations had. They didn't need to. Fae can mock with a glance, tease with a gesture, and somehow despite singing my Doctrine like a gentle lullaby, each and every line crashed over me like a wave, pulling me down into the next one, and the next one, and the next one.

By the time they finished the Testament of Values, I'd kind of lost track of time. Or anything but the gentle, inexorable rhythm of Tallulah beneath me, inside me, the harmonies and melodies of an entire congregation of Fae singing to me.

Not sure how much longer I can take this...

Do we displease you?

I tried to shake my head, but all I could manage was kinda flopping it back and forth. Nah. Nope. No. Like it. Love it. But...

"Sixth," she murmured, slipping her thumbs down my spine. Pianist's fingers.

Think I'mma pass out.

So our lullaby is doing its work? she whispered into my brain.

Puttin' me to sleep?

The Imperator and First Concubine both feel you need your rest. I agreed. But... A request?

Honestly, at that point I kinda would have granted her just about anything short of a partner or kid. Wave after wave washed over me and reminded me once again of the difference between moonshine and twenty year old cask aged whiskey. Want?

Without ever missing a stroke, she sat up behind me, placed her mouth against my ear. "May we finish before I return you to our bed?"

"Sure," I sighed out, only to be rewarded by a vicarious wave of euphoria as my long tall Sidhe lady's glee washed over me.

I'm not sure when I passed out. Fell asleep. Lost consciousness. I know that even in my dreams, I rocked gently back and forth, my tentacles undulating with that gentle, euphoric rhythm. My ladies dissolved into my Maw as they sang, their voices never dulling, never ceasing, even as that undulation drew them down into my depths time after time.

I've woken up with my sensitive bits still tingling before. Not often, but a few times back in the day, a few more times since I got here. But it's never happened without at least a little soreness before. My eyes slid open to see Siobhan lying beside me, Saffron propped atop me with her chin on her hands. "Wakey, wakey, Goof. Time for dinner."