Chapter 335: Just Keep Living

Kaden’s POV

​For seven days, time had completely stopped moving for me. The world outside went on, the sun rose and set, and people moved through their daily routines, but my life was frozen in place.

​It had been a week since the rejection in the garden, and Titan had been silent ever since. He was still there deep inside my mind, but he didn’t speak, he didn’t growl, and he didn’t fight. He just lay there in the dark like a hollow ghost. I had tried talking to him during the first few days, but after receiving nothing but silence, I eventually stopped. He needed time. At least, that was what I kept telling myself.

​As for me, my life had simply been put on hold. I spent my days standing by the large window of my office, staring out at the trees and telling myself over and over that I would be fine. After all, I had survived when Helen died. I had kept living then, so I should be able to do it now.

​But deep down, I knew losing Helen and losing Rebecca weren’t the same. I had loved Helen. She had been my first mate, my wife, and a woman who had been part of my life for years. I would never deny what she meant to me. But what I felt for Rebecca was different. There was no point in comparing them because I had loved them differently, and losing them had broken different parts of me. Helen had been taken from me by death. Rebecca was different. She was still alive, somewhere out there living her life, and yet I couldn’t be with her. Somehow, knowing she was alive but completely out of my reach hurt in a way I couldn’t explain.

​A knock sounded at my office door, but I didn’t answer. I didn’t tell the person to come in, nor did I move away from the window. I just kept staring out at the green forest with my back turned to the room. The door opened anyway, and even without looking, I knew the two familiar presences that stepped inside.

​"Kaden... how are you?" Kane asked gently from across the room.

​I didn’t respond. What kind of question was that anyway? I had lost my child three weeks ago, rejected my second-chance mate a week ago, and my wolf had apparently decided he was no longer interested in speaking to me. I was fucking wonderful.

​"Kaden, we’re worried about you," Logan said, his voice tight with concern. "You haven’t left this room since you returned from the Stone Pack estate. You’re not eating properly, and you’re letting the pack run itself."

​"I’m fine," I replied, my voice rough from barely speaking to anyone for days.

​Kane walked closer until he was standing just a few feet away from me. "Brother, you’re not fine. You have to continue living your life."

​A bitter scoff escaped my lips before I could stop it. "Life?" I repeated quietly as I finally turned away from the window. "What life? What exactly am I supposed to go back to? Sitting in meetings? Signing documents? Listening to Alphas argue over territory as if any of it fucking matters?"

​Kane’s face tightened. He stepped closer and placed a hand on my shoulder. "Please, Kaden. Please try."

​I stared at his hand for a second before lifting my eyes to his face. "You don’t know what it’s like, Kane. You have never experienced losing your mate and your unborn child twice. You don’t know what it feels like to wake up every single morning knowing you made terrible mistakes and decisions that can never be undone. You don’t know what it’s like to lose one family and somehow be given another chance, only to lose that one too."

​"Kaden..."

​"You don’t fucking know!"

​My voice filled the office, and Kane’s hand slowly dropped from my shoulder. Behind him, Logan remained silent. For the first time in a week, I felt Titan move somewhere deep inside me. It was faint, barely noticeable, but I felt him.

​Kane didn’t argue with me. He didn’t tell me to calm down or pretend that he understood. He simply looked at me for a few seconds before slowly nodding. "You’re right," he said quietly. "I don’t."

​That shut me up.

​"I don’t know what it feels like, and I pray I never do. I can’t stand here and tell you I understand something I’ve never experienced." Kane swallowed before continuing. "But you’re my brother, Kaden, and I’m watching you disappear. You still have a pack. You still have people who care about you. Logan is here. I’m here. And whether you want to hear it or not, there are thousands of people depending on you."

​"I know." I sighed deeply.

​"Then please." His voice softened. "You have to keep living. Not for Rebecca. Not for me or Logan. For yourself."

​For a while, I simply stared at the floor. Maybe a few days ago I would have told him to get out. Maybe I would have turned back toward the window and ignored both of them until they eventually gave up and left me alone. But I was tired. Tired of waking up every morning and wondering what the hell I was supposed to do with myself. Tired of staring at the same four walls. Tired of waiting for Titan to speak. Tired of feeling like my life had ended even though my heart was still beating. Rebecca had chosen to live. Maybe I needed to learn how to do the same.

​I sighed and looked away. "I’ll try," I said softly. "I’ll keep living."

​Kane let out a long breath of relief. "Thank you."

​"Don’t thank me yet."

​A small smile appeared on his face. "I’ll take whatever I can get." He paused before asking, "So... will you come down for lunch? The pack house is eating together."

​I rubbed the back of my neck, feeling the heavy exhaustion in my bones. "Yes. I’ll come down."

​Kane blinked at me. "Really?"

​I frowned. "Do you want me to change my mind?"

​"Nope." He immediately lifted both hands. "I’m shutting up."

​For once, he actually did.

​Logan smiled slightly, looking relieved. "Thank you, Alpha. I’ll ask the cook to get the meal ready."

​They both turned around to leave the office, but before they could reach the door, I called out to them. "Wait."

​They stopped and turned around. For a few seconds, I simply looked at them, trying to find the right words. I had been angry with both of them for weeks. At one point, I hadn’t even known whether I would ever be able to trust them again.

​"I was angry with what you both did to me," I finally said. "When I found out you erased my memories and helped Rebecca escape, I felt betrayed. You were the two people I trusted most in this world, and I couldn’t understand how my own brother and my Beta could do that to me."

​Logan lowered his eyes while Kane remained silent.

​"I hated both of you for it. But I’ve had enough time to think about everything that happened, and I understand now." I paused, forcing myself to admit something I probably wouldn’t have been capable of admitting a few weeks ago. "I know who I was back then. I know what I was doing to Rebecca, and I know why she was desperate enough to run from me. If I had been different, none of you would have needed to help her in the first place."

​"Kaden," Logan started, but I shook my head.

​"I’m not saying I like what happened. I probably never will. You took part in erasing my memories, and that’s not something I can pretend didn’t happen. But I understand why you did it now. You were trying to help her, and maybe you also saved me from making an even bigger mistake." I looked between the two of them and took a slow breath. "So let’s leave it behind us and move forward."

​For a moment, nobody moved. Logan’s eyes started to turn red, but Kane didn’t even try to hide what he was feeling. He crossed the space between us and threw his arms around me.

​I immediately stiffened. "Kane."

​"Shut up."

​"Kane."

​"Give me five seconds."

​I sighed heavily but didn’t push him away. "You’re fucking dramatic."

​"I know." He scoffed.

​Despite how hard I tried to be, a small scoff escaped me.

​"Thank you," he muttered, his voice thick with emotion.

​After a few seconds, Kane finally pulled back, keeping both hands on my shoulders as he looked at me. "So... we’re back to how things used to be?"

​I stared at him for a moment before giving him a small nod. "Of course."

​The smile that spread across his face was probably the first genuine smile I had seen from him in weeks. I turned my attention toward Logan, who immediately straightened when our eyes met.

​"And Logan, you are still my Beta," I told him. "And I still trust you."

​His eyes filled with tears, and he quickly wiped one away before bowing his head. "Thank you, Alpha. I won’t fail you."

​"Kaden," I corrected.

​He looked up at me, surprised.

​A small smile slowly appeared on his face. "Thank you, Kaden."

​Kane slapped Logan lightly on the shoulder. "Good. Now that we’ve finished this emotional family meeting before I start crying too, can we go eat?"

​"Get out of my office," I muttered.

​Kane laughed as he headed toward the door, and surprisingly, the sound didn’t annoy me as much as I expected. Logan followed him, and a few seconds later, the door closed quietly behind them.

​Once I was completely alone again, I turned back toward the large glass window. Outside, the wind moved gently through the trees, and I stood there watching the branches sway.

​I wasn’t healed. The pain was still there. Titan was still silent somewhere inside my mind. My child was still gone, and Rebecca was somewhere out there living a life that no longer included me. But maybe continuing to live didn’t mean I had to be okay. Maybe, for now, it simply meant getting through today and then trying again tomorrow.

​I took a deep breath, straightened my shoulders, and looked out at the trees one last time.

​"Keep living, Kaden," I whispered to myself. "Just keep living."