Chapter 179: Barely Holding On

*Runze’s POV*

The appointment ends with a list of simple instructions from the doctor: keep taking the vitamins, go for short daily walks, get some sunlight, and come back in two weeks.

We stand up to leave. But just as I reach for the door, Bael clears his throat.

"Are there any other activity restrictions?" Bael asks.

Dr. Xi stops writing and looks up. "Restrictions?"

Bael’s face is completely blank, his voice totally professional. "You mentioned light physical activity is fine now."

"Yes, that’s correct."

"Does that include..." Bael pauses for a fraction of a second, his voice dropping slightly. "...marital activity?"

I instantly freeze, my hand stopping right on the doorknob.

Dr. Xi doesn’t even blink. He has clearly heard this question a thousand times before. "I would prefer you wait another week, just to be safe."

Bael nods seriously. "One week?"

"Yes, if everything keeps going this well."

"Understood," Bael says.

I keep my eyes glued to a colorful anatomy poster on the wall, staring at a drawing of a human lung like it is the most interesting thing in the universe.

My cheeks are burning.

We walk out of the office and step into the elevator. The doors slide shut with a click, leaving just the two of us in the quiet cabin. The floor numbers begin to count down.

I keep looking straight ahead at the doors, refusing to turn around.

"...Did you really have to ask him that?"

Bael glances at me from the corner of his eye. "Ask what?"

I finally turn to look at him. He actually looks innocent. His face is calm, like he just asked about the weather.

"You know exactly what," I huff, crossing my arms.

A tiny, slow smile touches the corner of Bael’s mouth. "I thought it was a very important medical question."

"It was embarrassing."

"I disagree."

I glare at him, but my heart is doing wild flips in my chest.

Bael steps closer. He reaches out, sliding two fingers gently under my chin. He tilts my face up so I have to look directly into his grey eyes.

"I told you before, Runze," he says, his voice dropping into a low, quiet register that makes my knees feel weak. "I want to do you so badly."

The elevator keeps going down, but the world feels like it’s slowing down.

"But wanting you and actually touching you are two different things right now," Bael murmurs, his thumb brushing softly along my jawline. "I am holding myself back every single day."

I swallow hard.

Because... I know.

I know exactly how hard it has been for him. I feel it every single night when we lie in bed. I feel it in the mornings, in the way his kisses always end too quickly, and the way he pulls away first before things get too heated.

He deliberately sleeps near the edge of the mattress sometimes, trying to keep a safe distance, even though I always wake up curled right against his back anyway.

He has been carrying all of that frustration and desire entirely by himself, protecting me.

Only a week left.

It sounds so small.

A week ago, I still wasn’t allowed to leave the estate. A few weeks prior, I was lying in a hospital bed wondering if our baby would survive. Before that... I wasn’t even sure Bael wanted me.

But somehow, without me noticing exactly when it happened, we made it here.

One more week suddenly doesn’t feel very long at all.

The thought is a quiet pull in my chest, a reminder of how close we are to the end of this distance.

I step closer, closing the remaining space between us, and wrap my arms around his neck.

The slight curve of my six-month bump presses gently against him, just enough of a subtle shift to make the fit feel a little different than before, but neither of us pulls back.

I press my face into the crook of his neck, breathing in the familiar scent of his skin, before the words slip past my lips in a quiet, rushed whisper.

"I’ll make sure to recover quickly," I breathe right against his ear. "I... I want you in me, too."

The words slip out before I can stop them. My heart drops into my stomach the second the last syllable leaves my mouth.

*Did I really just say that out loud?*

I freeze, my face burning against his shoulder, wishing I could take the words back.

Bael goes completely still.

For a second, he doesn’t even seem to be breathing. Then, before I can even pull back to look at him, a sudden heat presses hard against my stomach. My breath hitches.

It is impossible to miss the speed at which he is getting hard right against me.

Before I can say anything, Bael suddenly pushes me back.

He isn’t rough, but his hands grip my shoulders firmly, keeping me at arm’s length. His chest is rising and falling fast, his breath coming in short, uneven puffs.

"Li Runze!" He snaps, his voice incredibly tight.

"I’m sorry, I didn’t—"

"Just shut it," he cuts in.

He turns his head away quickly. He leans the back of his head against the metal wall, taking a slow, shaky breath. Then, he raises one hand and covers his face.

I stare at him, my mouth slightly open. The back of his neck is dark red, and the color is spreading all the way to the tips of his ears.

He is actually blushing. Bael is standing there in the corner of the elevator, hiding his face from me.

Slowly, his fingers part slightly. He looks down at me with one dark eye through the gap.

"Your voice... is so fucking intoxicating right now," he says. His voice is deep, rough, and scraping low in his throat.

The sound goes straight down my spine. A sudden wave of heat rushes through my entire body, making my hands go a little weak.

My heart slams hard against my ribs, so loud I’m afraid he can hear it.

*Ding!*

The elevator doors slide open, letting in the bright light and the noise of the busy lobby.