Chapter 82

The next day, an imperial edict was rushed to Princess Danling of Puyang County.

After hearing it read aloud, Du Luoling was completely dumbfounded.

After all that going around in circles, she still had to enter the palace—and she had been directly made a consort!

What on earth had happened on Yun Yaoyao’s side?!

News soon came from the Du family as well. They even sent several of Du Guanliu’s trusted aides to accompany her.

Two days later, Du Luoling entered the palace in grand style and was bestowed the title of Consort Ling.

That very night, His Majesty summoned her to attend him.

Du Luoling felt like a pig being prepared for slaughter before the New Year. She had been washed several times until she was fragrant all over, then carried to Qianqing Palace.

Oh my god!

Although she had shouted every day in the modern world about wanting to sleep with her idols, ordered male models, and shared spicy pictures and little naughty stories with her best friend…

When it came to actually doing the deed, she truly didn’t have the nerve. She was afraid it would hurt, too.

As for how those little naughty stories described what happened next…

[The censors won’t allow it, so dear readers, please use your imaginations.]

Du Luoling felt a pain in her lower abdomen and shuddered involuntarily.

Especially after hearing what Yun Yaoyao had said to the system, she knew that Tu Shanjin was probably the male lead of this world.

Wouldn’t that mean he was as fierce as a skewer of grilled meat?

As luck would have it, the eunuch carrying her even ingratiatingly remarked, “Consort Ling, His Majesty is exceptionally mighty and vigorous in that regard!”

“When Consort Miao attended him for the first time, she called for water thirteen times that night!”

A night breeze swept past. Perhaps she had imagined some rather vivid scenes, because Du Luoling was so frightened that she jerked upward.

When they finally carried her to the dragon bed, the eunuchs respectfully withdrew.

Before long, a tall, imposing figure slowly approached.

Du Luoling closed her eyes and swallowed nervously.

“Jump,” a deep, pleasant male voice said.

Du Luoling: “?”

He meant “take it off,” right?

“Your Majesty, I’ve… I’ve already taken everything off. I’m not wearing any clothes.”

The figure drew closer. Candlelight reflected off a handsome, stern, and dignified face.

What a ridiculously handsome face.

With Tu Shanjin’s looks right in front of her, Du Luoling suddenly felt that she could handle this after all.

Who would have thought that the next words from this flawless, three-hundred-and-sixty-degree handsome face would be cold enough to break her heart?

“Put your clothes back on first. Then jump on the bed.”

The next morning, with dawn just beginning to break, the palace attendants came over to serve Du Luoling as she washed and dressed.

Shaking all over, Du Luoling got out of bed. The moment her feet touched the floor, she clamped her legs together, her face twisting in pain.

Damn… that really hurt!

The palace maid covered her mouth and giggled. “Consort Ling, I heard that when Consort Miao attended His Majesty for the first time, she was favored thirteen times. But Your Highness managed a full sixteen times—three more than her! You truly are blessed!”

Du Luoling: Heh. Would you believe her if she told you she had hopped around on the dragon bed like a monkey all night?

Did you want this blessing?

The palace maid was still immersed in the joy of seeing her mistress favored. “Your Highness, let me apply some medicine for you. It’ll heal faster that way.”

Du Luoling said, “No need.”

Applying medicine would expose everything.

“Hiss.” The moment both her legs properly touched the floor, Du Luoling let out another sharp cry of pain.

Sigh. She wondered whether her decision last night to betray the Du family and pledge allegiance to His Majesty after hearing what he had said had really been wise…

Fuling Palace was filled with the joyful atmosphere of a favored consort, while Yun Ning Palace was shrouded in sorrow.

“Waaah! Waaaaah, sob sob sob!”

“Your Highness, sob, the new favorite is laughing while the old favorite cries!”

“Your Highness, you’re lying here between life and death, and His Majesty already has someone else by his side! Sob sob sob!”

A series of loud cries resembling the croaking of bullfrogs poured out of Yun Ning Palace, startling the birds perched in the trees into flight.

“Enough howling, Niu Xiu’er. Anyone who didn’t know better would think Her Highness had already passed away.”

Xiao Wuzi instructed his subordinates to deliver a large quantity of precious medicinal herbs to Yun Ning Palace. When he saw the figure on the bed, he sighed and muttered under his breath, “Still, His Majesty really handled this badly.”

After learning that His Majesty had attended Consort Ling the previous night—and had called for water sixteen times—Xiao Wuzi, the number-one fan of the Consort Miao and His Majesty pairing, felt his dreams shatter.

After offering Niu Xiu’er a few stiff words of comfort, Xiao Wuzi left Yun Ning Palace.

Niu Xiu’er ate two bowls of rice, then returned to guarding Tu Shanjin and resumed wailing.

“It’s all my fault! On the watchtower, I was afraid my appearance would frighten people and embarrass Her Highness, so I didn’t stay by her side. If I had known this would happen, I would have guarded Her Highness with my life! Sob sob sob!”

“If Her Highness dies, I’ll follow her to the underworld. I absolutely won’t let her be lonely!”

“Your Highness, you don’t know this, but when His Majesty attended Consort Ling last night, the noise was absolutely earth-shaking! I heard the dragon bed nearly collapsed from the two of them rocking it. And our poor Her Highness is still lying here unconscious! How infuriating! Waaah!”

“…”

“Waaaaahhh… moo?”

Wait. Had Her Highness’s finger just moved?

Niu Xiu’er rubbed her eyes and stared for quite some time. Thinking she must have imagined it, she continued wailing.

After crying for a while longer, she realized that her mistress’s finger really had moved again.

Overjoyed, Niu Xiu’er rolled her eyes and decided to test something.

“Your Highness, Minister Lin said yesterday that he’ll come to see you as soon as court is dismissed today.”

It wasn’t Minister Lin.

“Your Highness, Rice Bucket seems to have fallen for Swift Wind. The two of them… no, the two horses have started living shamelessly happy lives together.”

It wasn’t Swift Wind either.

“The Xiongnu have invaded Yan Chi and captured ten cities in a row!”

It had nothing to do with the Xiongnu, either.

“His Majesty attended Consort Ling sixteen times, and now he cuddles her and kisses her little mouth every day. They’re so clingy that Consort Ling is practically flaunting it by taking a dump on our heads!”

Not long after those words left her mouth, the pale fingertips moved ever so slightly.

Niu Xiu’er wasn’t particularly bright, but she wasn’t stupid, either. She immediately figured out what was going on!

Whenever something involved His Majesty, Her Highness reacted!

Imperial Physician Shan had said that whether Her Highness could wake depended entirely on fate. If she stimulated her every day, perhaps she could help Her Highness wake up sooner?

Once she had the idea, Niu Xiu’er acted on it.

She leaned close to Tu Shanjin’s ear and spoke softly.

“Your Highness, if you don’t wake up soon, His Majesty is going to throw us out of the palace~”

“His Majesty attends Consort Ling every single day and treats her like the apple of his eye. They’re so clingy that they practically want to use the earth as their bed and start doing it right there!”

“Consort Ling will soon have a little prince or princess in her belly~~”

“His Majesty is even opening up the rear palace and bringing more than a hundred beautiful women into the palace. And that’s not all—he’s developed a taste for men and summoned dozens of strong, strapping men to serve him!”

“Your Highness, if you don’t wake up soon, the palace will be crawling with little princes and princesses~~~”

The more Niu Xiu’er spoke, the more outrageous she became.

The pale fingertip first gave an almost imperceptible twitch. Then the entire finger jerked. Before long, half the palm was trembling.

Niu Xiu’er was delighted.

Was this a miracle of medicine? Was Her Highness about to be angered awake?

But suddenly, the palm seemed to have been so enraged that it curled up, then went still again.

Niu Xiu’er’s spirits fell. She touched her mistress’s slender fingertip with one of her own rough, chubby fingers.

She hadn’t angered Her Highness into some kind of crisis, had she?

“Your Highness, please wake up soon. We’re all so worried about you…”