Chapter 84- Stupid Heart
Arabella Toussaint:
"Do you still miss him?" I was brushing my silver hair when Maya walked into my room. I caught her reflection in the mirror and pretended not to understand.
"Who are you talking about?"
She closed the door behind her and leaned against it, "You know exactly who I’m talking about, Ara."
I smiled when I realized she had called me Ara after such a long time and returned my attention to my hair that now covered half of my back.
"I saw you staring at Jasmine’s engagement post that day," I stopped brushing. For a long moment, neither of us spoke. She slowly walked over and sat at the edge of my bed, "Do you still think about him?"
My eyes dropped to the hairbrush resting in my hands, "I don’t know."
"Ara!" She let out a quiet sigh, but I shook my head, staring at my lap.
"That’s the only answer I have, Maya."
Finally, I placed the brush on the dresser and turned my head to look at her, "I know it sounds stupid... but sometimes... I want to go back."
"What?" She practically jumped to her feet, "Are you crazy?"
I glared at her, asking her silently to lower her voice.
"I’m sorry," She whispered, glancing towards the door, in case Toby and Tessa were awake. "But have you lost your mind?"
I looked away, trying to come up with a reasonable explanation. But I didn’t have one.
"Why would you even think of going back," She crouched in front of me, "Those bitches wouldn’t let you breathe, Ara. They’ll make your life miserable all over again."
"Don’t forget, Maya. In their eyes, I’m still a criminal... a murderer. My name needs to be cleared. Do you think I should keep running my whole life?"
How to tell her that I was tired of hiding my identity? Whenever a werewolf walked into our café, it was an unsaid rule that I’d be sent to the back room until they left. My friends were protective, and I loved them for it. But I didn’t want this kind of life.
I was exhausted. Exhausted from watching over my shoulder. Exhausted from responding to a name that wasn’t mine. For three years, I had been surviving as Aria.
When I got rid of the mate mark, I thought it was enough. Not anymore.
Someday, I wanted to get married and have kids. I might never fall in love, but my heart desired a partner. A companion who would stay by my side.
I had lived my life for three years. But now I wanted to settle down.
We were still silent when she scooted closer and gently brushed her thumb across my cheek. I looked up with a frown, realizing that I was crying.
I let out a quiet laugh and quickly wiped the tears away with the back of my hand.
"Sorry for being a crybaby," I muttered with a chuckle. She smiled warmly as she wiped my cheek again.
"Hey. It’s me, Maya," she reminded me gently while getting up. "Your best friend. Remember? No need to feel sorry for being you."
She then held my hand and pulled me up, "Think hard, Ara. Think again. Do you really want to go back just because you’re feeling guilty? Or is there any other reason too? The one you’re not ready to face..."
She looked at me meaningfully while saying that and gave my hand a gentle squeeze.
I knew what she was trying to ask. I searched for answers, and suddenly a pair of golden eyes smiled back at me.
I lowered my eyes to our intertwined hands and whispered, "I don’t know."
Maya simply nodded. And for the first time in three years, I wasn’t sure if I was running from my past or running back to it.
***
Chairs scraped against the floor as the waiters pulled them down from the tables. A cleaner was wiping the large windows while Toby stood near the counter, checking the coffee machines.
The smell of freshly baked bread and coffee had already filled the place.
The café wouldn’t open for another forty minutes, and everyone was busy preparing for the morning rush.
I was standing near the office with my tablet, going through today’s reservations, when the front door suddenly flew open. One of our waitresses rushed inside, out of breath.
"You’re late, Chloe," I told her, still looking at my tablet, but she didn’t seem to hear me.
"Ms. Aria!" Her eyes were practically glowing with excitement as she hurried toward me, "You won’t believe this... but I just watched it on TV."
I lowered my tablet with a sigh. "I might believe it after you explain why you’re twenty minutes late."
"No, Miss Aria. Seriously. Listen!" She grabbed my arm in excitement but then suddenly seemed to remember that I was technically her boss and let it go, "They’re going to show him."
I frowned, "Show who?"
"The king!"
My fingers froze against the tablet, "What... what are you trying to say?"
She gave me an incredulous look, "Oh, Miss Aria. I’m talking about the Lycan King! Have you forgotten? There will be a huge Royal event for his engagement. It will be covered live, and all major channels will air it."
Tessa, who was cleaning the table, abandoned it and turned towards us, "Wait. You mean they’re actually going to show his face?"
"Yes!" Chloe practically squealed like a kid, "For the first time. Oh, God. I’ve heard he looks like a Greek God."
Looks like a Greek God? He is the Greek God, girl!
Maya, who was playing some game on her phone, paused and looked at Chloe. Everyone was suddenly talking at once.
Everyone except me. I lifted my gaze and caught Maya watching me closely.
Chloe suddenly turned toward me, and her eyes lit up even more, "Ms. Aria! We should play it on the big screen here..." She hurried to explain, waving both her hands excitedly, "... think about it. Everyone will want to watch his first public appearance. More customers will pour in."
Tessa clapped her hands in delight. "That’s a very good idea."
They all were nodding their heads, discussing the upcoming engagement of the king, while I stood there feeling as if someone had slowly pulled the ground from beneath my feet.
I had known this day was coming. I had seen Jasmine’s post. I had even told myself that I was happy for them.
In a few days, he would be standing beside another woman. I had escaped the palace not only for my freedom, but also to let him be with Jasmine. Moon Goddess did fulfill my wish. Then why did I feel this sudden tightness in my throat and in my chest?
I tried to swallow this unexpected lump. Three years should have been enough. Apparently, my stupid heart hadn’t gotten the message.
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